A Place of Springs

God's Love and More

2012-02-13T05:23:00.000-08:00

“May our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and by His grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word” (II Thessalonians 2:16).

I always enjoy seeing the colorful Valentine’s Day decorations at this time of year, and it’s an appropriate time to meditate on God’s priceless love. This verse is a favorite of mine because it reminds me not only of His great love for me but of the other blessings I am given as well.
Love and grace: God loved me enough to send Jesus to the cross for me, though I did nothing to deserve or earn this (Ephesians 2:5). His love is everlasting, and no pain, illness, or difficulty can separate me from it (Jeremiah 31:3, Romans 8:39).
Eternal encouragement: God’s support and help will never end. They are as eternal and boundless as He is, and He always hears my cry (Psalm 10:17).

Good hope: When my hope seems gone, He miraculously restores it through Scripture and the comforting power of the Holy Spirit within me (Romans 15:4,13). I have hope for my eternal future, and I am given continual daily hope as I face the frustrations and disappointments of my disabilities.

Strength: I am given God’s divine power to live this life, even in weakness, trials, and pain (II Peter 1:3), and I am constantly protected against Satan’s attacks (II Timothy 4:18).

When I feel overwhelmed and unable to keep going, I remind myself of what I possess. Just as the cheerful reds and pinks of February are a bright spot in the midst of a gray winter, so the comfort of these divine gifts lifts me up on my darkest days. I can make it - through this day and through this life - because of God’s love and more.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, how I praise You for Your unending love, grace, encouragement, hope, and strength. Teach me to live my days in the power of these truths. Amen.

Your Love Is Ever Before Me

2012-02-01T12:40:00.000-08:00

“Your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in your truth” (Psalm 26:3).

I believe God loves me, but at times I have wanted Him to show His love for me in a way of my choosing – namely giving me relief from pain and restoring some lost abilities. Then I noticed this verse for the first time.

During a heavy snow storm I realized that God’s love was literally before me in the beauty of the snow-covered scenery. His love is before my eyes in the comforts of my home and in the faces, voices, and e-mails of those I love and who love me. His love is revealed on the pages of His precious Word, not to mention the strength this love brings to help me through each day. I was amazed at how blind I can be to the myriad of ways in which He shows his love.

I looked at the second half of this verse and was challenged again. If I am walking continually in His truth, I will take every thought and hold it up to the light of His Word. If a thought is not based on Scripture, I need to cast it aside and replace it with His truth. Being aware of His love and basing my thoughts on His Word, I will be filled with peace and contentment even amidst my pain and yearnings.

God does love me – more than I can comprehend with my limited earthly perceptions. May I trust that love enough to let go of my demands and begin to grasp how wide and long and high and deep His love is, that I might be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God (Ephesians 3:18,19).

Prayer: Lord, may I say with the Psalmist, “Thy steadfast love is before my eyes and I walk in faithfulness to Thee” (RSV). Open my eyes and increase my faith. Amen.

Living a Balanced Life

2012-01-28T14:59:00.000-08:00

“May the God of peace. . .equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him” (Hebrews 13: 20,21).

Birds have an amazing sense of balance. Whether perching on thin wires or hanging on bird feeders, they maintain their stability. As I watch birds I am aware of my own need for balance in life.

I need balance in my physical activities so that I don’t overextend myself with housework, shopping, or exercise and suffer later. I need balance in my relationships so that I don’t become overly burdened with the problems of others, but rather trust that God is using these trials to work out His plan in their lives. I need balance in handling my emotions so that when the downward cycles come, I remember what God has done in the past and believe He will lift me up again. Since I struggle with perfectionism, I need balance to keep the perfect from being the enemy of the good in each of these areas. Above all, I need balance in my perspective of this earthly life. Knowing this is not all there is and what great things lie ahead in eternity helps me to handle the grief of unfulfilled expectations and dreams here on earth.

Jesus is the perfect example of a balanced life. Even though His days were filled with ministry, He made time with God His first priority. Although He could have healed every person’s disease and fixed every problem on the planet, He did not. He grieved over Jerusalem’s impending destruction but did not stop it. He wept over death and became angry at injustice. He certainly understands the struggles of balance in this fallen world.

Between the world’s messages and my own perceptions, balance can be very difficult to maintain. Only God can give me the discernment to know what to do or not to do and the self-discipline to follow through on those decisions. His Word and His example are the stability I need to keep me hanging on.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, help me to seek Your will for balance in each aspect of my life and give me a willing heart to accept Your plan. Amen.

Frozen yet Flowing

2012-01-21T06:43:00.000-08:00

“As they make music they will sing, ‘All my fountains are in you.’ ”
(Psalm 87;7b).
“All my springs are in thee" ( KJV).

My husband enjoys winter camping. He doesn’t mind sleeping in freezing temperatures and enjoys hiking in the snow within reason. He also enjoys photography and has taken some great photos of frozen waterfalls in winter.

As I read this verse, I thought about those frozen waterfalls. During temperate weather they flow freely, sometimes with forceful gushes and other times with slower trickles, but still actively moving. When freezing temperatures come they no longer flow consistently, but it is interesting how the water freezes while flowing, as if determined to keep moving for as long as possible. Even in their frozen state they are beautiful. When exposed to the briefest of warmer temperatures, they slowly begin moving again.

I see myself in those waterfalls. At times in my life God has given me the ability to do many things and enjoy a gushingly active life. Now I am frozen many times by pain and illness. That is especially true for me in fall and winter, as my pain intensifies with colder temperatures. But even on days when I’m not flowing too well, God’s springs are still flowing within me. Just as a winter waterfall does not truly dry up while in its frozen state, so even in my limitations God is still working within me and can use me for His glory in some way.

God’s wellspring of life will be within me throughout this entire earthly journey, regardless of what I physically can or cannot do. As I seek His will and direction, He will provide ways for me to show His power and strength, whether I am actively moving, slowly trickling, or completely frozen. And one day, this body will again be able to flow freely for Him in every way.

Prayer: O Lord, Your Word says that whoever believes in You will have streams of living water flow from within him (John 7:38). Even when I am physically “frozen”, let my spirit never cease to be a testimony of praise to You. Amen.

God Is My Refuge

2012-01-16T19:24:00.000-08:00

“I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I will trust’”

(Psalm 91:2).

Four hours from me lies the island of Assateague, Virginia. The area is a combination of public beach and national wildlife refuge. As a bird watcher I greatly enjoy visiting the area. In summer the place is full of tourists. In the winter it becomes a rather cold and lonely place, but if one is willing to brave the elements there are many different species of birds to be seen.

A wildlife refuge provides “a sheltered or protected state from something threatening, harmful, or unpleasant”. We might think of a haven, sanctuary, or harbor. When I read the analogy of the Lord being my refuge I think of Assateague, particularly during the winter. From what do the birds need protection? Predators, hunters, starvation, and exposure. Just as this island provides protection for wildlife, so God provides protection for me.

When Satan tries to devour me with negativity and anxiety, the Lord delivers me from his snare. Sometimes God uses my limitations as protection from misplaced values and idolatry. The safe harbor of God’s Word protects me from the pulls of the world’s values and belief system.

If I visit during Assateague’s winter desolation, I will see birds that are not there during warm, sunny weather. Just so, in the desolation of my suffering, God is conforming me into the image of His Son. Were it not for my pain, the character qualities that God desires to build in me might never develop.

Although no motels are permitted on the island of Assateague, there are various ones nearby. One is actually called The Refuge Inn. Spiritually speaking, I need to stay permanently “checked in” to God’s Refuge Inn. There I will find the shelter, protection, and safety of my loving God. And I may even see beauty in the desolation.

Prayer: Loving God, just as You are so faithful to shelter and protect me from harm, may I be faithful in trusting Your decisions and plans for my life. Amen.

A New Heart for a New Year

2012-01-03T18:14:00.000-08:00

“I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh”
(Ezekiel 36:26).

I like new things. Not that I don’t appreciate the old, but new things do bring me earthly satisfaction. And God knows I am in need of a new heart. My sinful, hardened heart - which controls my thoughts, emotions, and actions - does not handle pain and suffering well.

In Beth Moore’s study on Believing God, she says that with our new hearts we have new thinking, new reflections, new memory, new resolutions and determinations of will, and new emotions and passions. These words bring me such joy and hope! I need new, positive ways of viewing my situations rather than negative, discouraging ones. I want to look back on my healthier days with thankfulness rather than grief, seeing God’s hand through it all and trusting Him for what I still don’t understand. I can refocus difficult memories through the lens of God’s attributes. God also cleanses me from the idols I have made of perfect health and a pain-free existence. When I am tempted to respond to my problems in the old way, I can remember that my new heart enables me to make different choices.

Of course my old earthly nature is still with me and I still carry remnants of my heart of stone. I will not always handle my circumstances, thoughts, or emotions in new ways. Praise God He understands and forgives. Just as bodily muscles need to be stretched and exercised to grow, so each trial that lies ahead is an opportunity to build up the muscles of my new heart, growing me in faith and perseverance. I am a new creation, and by God’s mercy and grace I can respond in new ways through this new year.

Prayer: O God, thank you for giving me a new heart. Strengthen this heart that I may be consistently faithful to You through all my days. Amen.

Looking Forward

2012-01-03T18:13:00.000-08:00

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!”

(Isaiah 43:18).

A new year brings new hopes, dreams, and resolutions. Living with ongoing health issues however, I sometimes struggle with remembering what life was like in the past rather than looking forward, and changes are hard to accept. At times I grieve over my losses, and I can appreciate my memories and be thankful for all I experienced before. Yet this is my life now, and if I truly believe that God is always good and always in control, then I should be looking forward.

God is using these trials to conform me into the image of Christ. I am a much more thankful person now, appreciating not only every pain-free moment but also the countless times that He has enabled me to enjoy things through the pain. I am slowly learning what things are important in God’s eyes rather than being overly concerned about accomplishing my own personal agenda. I have a much stronger reliance and dependence on the Lord and more compassion for those who suffer. Some of these changes may not have been possible without experiencing health problems of my own.

God says not to dwell on the past. He is doing a new thing in each of our lives – a much better thing in the light of eternity. I want to remember that thought as I go through life struggling to enjoy things while hurting or giving certain things up. As the new year begins, I can rest in knowing that God’s love and mercy have sustained me in the past, and will continue to do so in the days and months ahead. One day I will have an unending eternity of pain-free existence with God. Until then, “forgetting what lies behind, and straining toward what is ahead, we press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called us heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13,14).

Prayer: O Lord, you are the God of my past, present, and future. As I begin this new year, help me to balance thankfulness for my past with faith for my future. Amen.

Courage to Face the New Year

2011-12-30T18:45:00.000-08:00

“Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s. Go out and face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you: (II Chronicles 20:15, 17).

For many people, the new year brings feelings of optimism and hope. For us with ongoing health problems that may not be the case. We may have a “vast army” of problems, and unless God performs a miracle, the new year will bring more of the same old battles and perhaps new ones. Trying to be optimistic is indeed a challenge.

I think the word “battle” is very appropriate to describe ongoing problems with pain. I experience exhaustion and depression from the battle of trying to stay on top of whatever problems are troubling me at the time. When I think of battle, negative words come to mind, such as fear, weariness, and fighting. But there is a positive word as well - courage. A few months back I read this quote on my daughter’s Facebook page: “Courage does not always roar; sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow’ ” (Mary Anne Radmacher).

As I look to this new year, I may feel I don’t have the strength to enter it with a “roar” of boldness and faith that I will triumph valiantly every day. Yes, God is more than able to bring me through in that way but many times my faith and trust in Him wanes. I can however choose to remember God’s omniscient grace, love, and power. I can say, “Yes, Lord, I begin this new year humbly and quietly looking to You for the courage to try tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. This battle is not mine. It is Yours, and no matter how overwhelming the year may look, I can face it because of Who You are – the Lord, mighty in battle.”

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I praise You and thank you that I can enter this new year with courage, knowing that along with Your blessings, You will bring me through every battle I will face. Amen.

Christmas Peace and Joy

2011-12-18T04:04:00.000-08:00

“He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end” (Isaiah 9:6,7).

As I prepare for Christmas, at times I am filled with conflicting emotions. I praise God for the celebration of Christ’s birth and for loved ones with whom to share it. Yet my heart is also heavy for those who suffer. Life is full of struggles - grief over the loss of loved ones, hurt from broken relationships, loneliness due to separation from family, and discouragement with physical limitations during the season’s activities.

There have been moments when I have wondered how I can possibly be joyful and peaceful when this world is so full of pain, yet I also realized that if the world were not hurting, there would be no need for a Savior. I reflected on that first Christmas. That time was far from peaceful and pleasant. Roman rule was oppressive and life was a struggle to endure. Mary and Joseph faced ostracism, pain, homelessness, and separation from family. Those who anticipated the birth of the Messiah were expecting to see a conquering king, which was not the case.

Yet we on the other side of the cross know the significance of that first Advent, and because of it, we anticipate the second one. With the second coming, all pain, suffering, and disappointment will end. We will truly be able to rejoice without sorrow, and perhaps my joy this year will be more in anticipation of Christ’s future coming than in His past one. Whatever we are facing this Christmas, may we remember the victory and eternal life that Christ’s birth and subsequent death and resurrection bring. May that knowledge bring us peace, and may we rejoice. “I will say it again: Rejoice!” (Philippians 4:4).

Prayer: Lord Jesus, thank you for coming to this earth so that I may one day live with You in heaven. May I truly rejoice in and celebrate Your birth this Christmas season, even as I long for Your return. Amen.

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Our Christmas Gift of Sacrificial Praise to God

2011-12-12T07:54:00.000-08:00

“Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise” (Hebrews 13:15).

I usually associate the word sacrifice with Easter, remembering Christ’s death on the cross for our sins. At Christmas I may think of giving in a financially sacrificial way to an individual, cause, or organization. However, reading the definitions of the word sacrifice changed my thinking this Christmas season.

To sacrifice may mean not only giving something up but also foregoing something valued for the sake of something else or permitting injury or destruction to. The holidays are a mixed blessing for me. I want to enjoy and appreciate all of the good things and yet I struggle with limitations such as being unable to do as much baking, socializing, or decorating as I would like, or eating all of the beautiful sweets that I love. But I can forego these pleasures and give these desires up as a gift to God.

I also pondered the fact that God the Father made a huge sacrifice of love for us that first Christmas. He willingly allowed Jesus to leave the splendor and majesty of His heavenly home to live in poverty and rejection. This sacrifice involved 33 years of separation and a life of pain and suffering for His Son, culminating in death on the cross. If Father and Son both gave so sacrificially for me that first Christmas, surely I can give up whatever desires I have this holiday season that will not be fulfilled.

God has allowed me, for whatever reasons, to have these physical trials. I can become angry, depressed, or frustrated this holiday season and feel sorry for myself, or I can choose to willing yield whatever I must for the sake of His perfect will, knowing that the celebrations in heaven will more than compensate for my disappointments here. And hopefully the gift of sacrificial praise that I give this Christmas will not be a one-time gift but an ongoing one, a small token of my thankfulness and love to Him who gave so much.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I thank you for all Your wonderful blessings. I willingly choose to offer you my gift of sacrificial praise through this Christmas season.

God with Us

2011-12-10T07:21:00.000-08:00

“He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:6).

This is a very familiar verse, yet it was only recently that I meditated on its significance to my life.

Wonderful Counselor - Wonderful is defined as amazing, marvelous, excellent. A counselor gives advice and guidance as well as listening to cares and concerns. Jesus is the most marvelous counselor of all. Many times I need direction for life regarding medical decisions, financial decisions, or interpersonal relationships. When I am discouraged, disheartened, or fearful, the Lord is there to hear my pleas and comfort my spirit.

Mighty God - To be mighty is to be powerful, strong, and great. The might and power of Jesus conquered sin and death. That same power lives within me by the power of the Holy Spirit and will sustain me through any earthly pain and suffering.

Everlasting Father – God is eternal and unchangeable. His love and faithfulness are never ending. He sees all, knows all, and controls all. What comfort that brings to me in the uncertainties of life.

Prince of Peace – Peace is an undisturbed state of mind or serenity and is something we all long for. Ongoing health problems and the trials and turmoil of this fallen world constantly try to rob me of my peace. Yet by putting my trust and faith in Christ, I am able to have peace under any conditions.

Matthew 1:23 also says that Jesus would be called Immanuel, meaning God with us. That word alone brings me great comfort this Christmas season. Regardless of my health or the chaos in this world, God is here. He truly is with me - not in physical form as on that first Christmas Day so long ago, but in a powerful living presence within me. A physical presence may leave me, but the Spirit of God remains with me until one day I see Him face to face.

“Surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Matthew 28:20).

Prayer: Lord Jesus, as I rejoice in Your birth, may I also rejoice in the wonder of knowing Your presence within me. Thank You for being my counselor, my might, my stability, and my peace. Amen.

God - Our Ever Faithful Evergreen

2011-12-04T04:19:00.000-08:00

“I will answer him and care for him. I am like a green pine tree; your fruitfulness comes from me” (Hosea 14:8).

There are many visual signs of the Christmas season, and Christmas trees are one my favorites. I was surprised to find the above verse in which God likens Himself to a pine tree, and I found the analogy quite interesting.

The pine tree is an evergreen. It never loses its needles and remains green despite the cold of winter. Its foliage is always there to provide shade and shelter. How clearly this describes our Lord, who is there for us always, faithful in every season of life.

The pine tree produces cones in various shapes and sizes. Some cones yield more seeds than others, and some have fewer flaws. Yet they are all attached to and part of the tree, relying on its nourishment to grow. In the same way we are all God’s creation, regardless of our differing abilities. He designed each of us uniquely, and we live and grow according to His perfect plan, relying on His faithfulness to meet our every need.

The cones produce fruit, but only by being attached to the tree itself. The seeds within the cones are dispersed to grow new trees elsewhere. Our illnesses do not keep us from producing fruit for our Lord if we are abiding in Him. He uses us for His kingdom despite our weaknesses, and at times because of them. Our lives may impact someone else, who in turn will affect yet another. By His grace and strength, we too can spread seeds for Him.

New growth on a pine branch is sometimes referred to as a candle. Despite our chronic illnesses, we can grow and shine as candles in some way this Christmas season, scattering seeds of love and faith among those whose lives we touch.

Prayer: Dear Lord, thank you for being my source of life, ever constant and unchanging. Remind me of Your faithfulness in the evergreens I see. Amen.

Keeping Christmas in Perspective

2011-12-02T13:19:00.000-08:00

“Turn away my eyes from looking at vanity, and revive me in Thy ways: (Psalm 119:37 NASV).

As much as I rejoice in the meaning of Christmas, I also have a hard time with what is has become in our society. I can feel exhausted and even offended by the constant barrage of materialistic glitz and glitter of worldly commercialism. On the other hand, I myself am guilty of being lured into that mindset as I prepare for the holiday. I can become discontent with what I want personally, or can’t or shouldn’t buy for others. Food and decorations can also be a trial rather than an enjoyment. I feel overwhelmed by the magazine covers showing the perfectly decorated Christmas tree and holiday table settings. New recipes make festive foods look so simple, yet I know otherwise.

Although all of these things can be good and enjoyable aspects of the holiday season if kept in perspective, it is especially difficult for me when all things must revolve around my pain and energy level. I may end up feeling depressed, tense, and discouraged rather than anticipating the celebration of Christ’s birth.

During the holidays more than ever I need God’s Word to revive me and keep my eyes and heart focused on eternal things rather than worldly ones. Satan has a way of turning even the good things into temptations and struggles. I need to prepare and guard myself against these attacks. Christ’s birth can and will be celebrated with or without the glitter. Whether I am in plenty or in want financially or physically this holiday season, my focus should be on knowing that because of the gift of Jesus, “no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him” (I Corinthians 2:9). And amidst the pulls of commercialism and pain, God is giving me gifts even now if I keep my eyes on Him.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, during this blessed season of celebrating Your birth, help me to put aside the vanities of the world and to seek You above all else. As I do, You revive my heart (Psalm 69:33 NAS) bringing me true peace and joy. Amen.

Regardless of Our Weaknesses, We Are Important Instruments in the Body of Christ

2011-11-27T02:31:00.000-08:00

“Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it”
(I Corinthians 12:27).

One seasonal tradition that I enjoy is attending our community orchestra holiday concert. I read an interesting analogy in the book Living above Worry and Stress by the Women of Faith series comparing our Christian lives to an orchestra.

During a concert some instruments are playing and others are at rest, yet all musicians keep their eyes fixed on the conductor. “The church is like that orchestra. At times, we work hard and the music of our lives is glorious. At other times, we are allowed to rest. Others take up the song. Whether you are giving your all right now, or are in a season of attentive rest. . . , you are an important part of a larger group. And the result of our woven lives is beautiful, and it all glorifies God”.

In seasons of pain and limitations it is easy to feel lost and insignificant, particularly during holidays. We may not be able to participate in church functions and ministries or serve our families and friends the way we used to. When I begin entertaining those thoughts, I think of the orchestra. At times in my life I have been more of a violin – in fact my family has been known to call me “high strung”! Now I see myself as more of a triangle. That instrument doesn’t play too often, but it still adds to certain songs.

We are all important to the work of God’s kingdom. We may not play as frequently as in the past and only God may hear our notes, but even our rests can be preparing us for the part we will play in the glorious eternal orchestra of praise to our God.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, keep me faithful in using the gifts you have given me to serve You as I am able. And when times come that I can no longer “play”, whether for a song or for a season, let me keep my eyes on You, resting in the truth that I am still a valuable part of the orchestral body of believers.

Great Is Thy Faithfulness

2011-11-22T08:24:00.000-08:00

“I remember my affliction and my wandering. . . and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness (Lamentations 3:19-22).

When our girls were young, at Thanksgiving we started a Thankful Tree. We drew a tree trunk on paper and each of us had a branch on which to write what were thankful for that year. Throughout many of those years my thanks related to activities involving our family or enjoyable personal blessings I had received. In recent years however, it has been more difficult and sometimes even depressing to evaluate my life. I seem to associate every season with a different health problem: in winter – ear and eye pain; in spring – severe allergies; in summer - major back relapses. And that doesn’t include emotional issues or family problems. If I continue this train of thought, I lose the entire purpose of the thankful tree!

Yes, it is true that physically my life has changed drastically over the past 25 years. But as I remember the difficulties of the past year, I also need to remember the blessings that God gave through them: medicines that gave pain relief, even if temporarily; a special honey that greatly reduced my allergy symptoms; a wise physical therapist who gave me just the right exercises; a cushion that allows me to sit for longer periods without pain. These may not be what “normal” people would write on their thankful tree, but they are definitely gifts from God that have brought me through difficult times. And I must not forget the wonderful support of family and friends.

As I remember my afflictions this Thanksgiving season, may I also see God’s constant faithfulness and compassion that have carried me through another year. “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever” (Psalm 118:1).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, through every season of my life You do not change and Your compassions do not fail. Great is Your Faithfulness to me. Amen.

The Lord Has Dealt Bountifully with Me

2011-11-14T05:04:00.000-08:00

“Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.”

As Thanksgiving approaches, I like to focus more than usual on thankfulness. Years ago our family began a “Thankful Tree”. Each of us wrote what we were most thankful for that year. Now it is uplifting and sometimes humorous to read back over our lists from years past.

With more and more health challenges, thankfulness can be difficult, particularly depending on my circumstances and pain level at the time. It can also be challenging if I spend too much time dwelling on what other people do or possess.

Our church recently focused on Missions for a month and invited various speakers to come and tell about their ministries. Some of the testimonies were quite powerful and convicting. Hearing of what other believers are enduring - violence, famine, abuse, and countless other forms of suffering - helped me to put my life in a different perspective.

I don’t believe God expects me to downplay my sufferings. He knows and understands my daily physical, mental, and emotional trials. But I do believe He wants me to see the good that He brings each day. My times are in God’s hands and everything He brings into my life has the potential for my ultimate good and blessing, whether here or in eternity, if I allow it.

There have been and will be times when I am unable or unwilling to be thankful. In those moments, praise God I can rely on the truth that He knows my frame and remembers I am dust (Psalm 103: 14). He understands my human frailties and loves and accepts me even in my failures. But as I seek the good in any and every circumstance, the constant goodness and bountifulness of God shine more clearly.

Prayer: You bless my life and heal me inside, over and over again. You touched my heart and brought peace of mind, over and over again. And all I can say is I love you; all I can say is I need you; all I can say is I thank you Lord, for all that You’ve done in my life (Over and Over Again, Mercy/Vineyard Music 1992).

God's Blessings of Unfailing Love and Wonderful Deeds

2011-11-14T04:54:00.000-08:00

“He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains. Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men, for he breaks down gates of bronze and cuts through bars of iron”

(Psalm 107:14-16).

Sometimes my pain feels like a prison. Whether it’s physical pain or the mental anguish of anxiety and depression, I feel trapped and unable to escape. Then these words are of great encouragement to me. During one of my worst moments I made notes on this chapter listing all the things God does for me. I go back to that list continually.

God leads me and shows me where to “settle” when I’m wandering (verse 7). He gives direction on where to go or what to do when I need guidance. And if I choose unwisely, He can bring good even out of that.

He satisfies my hunger and thirst ( verse 9) when I feel dissatisfied with my life, pulled by the world, or longing for some unknown fulfillment.

He brings me out of the darkness and gloom (verse 14) of anxiety, despair and depression , bringing victory over these behaviors if I cling to the truths of His Word rather than my own thoughts.

He heals me by His Word (verse 20). Even when God does not physically remove my suffering, His written Word heals my heart and mind.

He stills my storm and guides me to my desired haven (verse 29-30). In the chaos and confusion of life, He brings a peace not of this world.

He turns my deserts into pools of water and my parched ground into springs (verse 35). He may use others along with His Word to bring me relief, and He may use my suffering to minister to others.

All this He has done and will continue to do. Let me give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love and wonderful deeds in my life!

Prayer: My Savior and my God, whether You free me literally or spiritually, “Set me free from my prison, that I might praise Your name (Psalm 142:7). Amen.

Our Time Is in God's Hands

2011-11-09T08:14:00.000-08:00

“Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of very opportunity, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15,16).

The King James Version of this passage says to walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time. One definition of walking circumspectly means to be heedful of potential consequences, being prudent, careful, thoughtful, and observant. Redeeming can mean making something acceptable in spite of negative qualities. I find this to be very wise advice as I walk this life of chronic pain.

I used to be quite good at multi-tasking. Everything was done as efficiently as possible to save time. As my health deteriorated, I learned to slow down and do less. Too much busyness overwhelmed me physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Increasingly over the past months, my family responsibilities with ageing parents and grown children are requiring a good bit of time and I feel very overwhelmed. Trying to help others while either in pain or exhausted is draining. I also become my own worst enemy by imposing my perfectionist standards on myself, thinking I need to be everything to everyone. I become frustrated and discontent at what I can’t do, yet also overwhelmed and fearful about what I need to do.

God has a plan and knows what I can and can’t handle. He has faithfully shown me that when He calls me to do something, He gives me the power to accomplish it, and when rest is best, I need to accept it. Every day I must seek the Lord’s plan for my time. Some days it may be best for me to rest and some days I may need to push through the pain and keep going. Whatever God’s plan of the day is, He will give me the grace to accept and even endure it if necessary. Whether I am in a season of plenty or want, God can redeem the time if I wisely yield it to Him.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, “teach us to number our days, that we may present to Thee a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12 NAS). Whatever our days bring, whether seemingly too much or too little, help us to accept them as Your perfect plan for our lives. Amen.

Viewing Our Pain from Higher Ground

2011-11-02T17:35:00.000-07:00

“You have not handed me over to the enemy but have set my feet in a spacious place”
(Psalm 31:8).

I saw a movie once about a psychologist who helped people manage their grief over the death of a loved one. He took a group of people out into the middle of a busy city street and had them observe their surroundings. He then took them up to the roof of a tall building on that same street, look around again, and tell him what they saw. Their responses were completely different. Instead of flashing lights, noisy traffic, and harried people, they saw blue sky, sunshine, and rooftop gardens. He reminded them that they were in the same place as before only their perspective had changed.

I love that analogy. So many times I become overwhelmed by the entrapped feelings of despair and discouragement. I can’t see past my current pain and suffering. In those moments God can lift me up to a higher place – a place where I can see things differently, even if just for a moment.

Of course there may be times when the pain or suffering is so great that I feel I can’t see beyond the moment. Then I find it helpful to remember something I read once. Ask myself not what does this time of agony mean to me, but what does it mean to God? And if I have no answer, remember nothing is a lost cause with God.

In our most desperate moments, if we can mentally drag ourselves upwards to that higher ground, God may very well give us a glimpse - however brief - of His divine love, mercy and grace. We may see a bit of our eternal reward in a ray of sunshine through the clouds or a flower through a brick wall. And that different perspective may be what just what we need to keep hanging on.

Prayer: I want to live above the world, though Satan’s darts at me are hurled; for faith has caught the joyful sound, the song of saints on higher ground. Lord lift me up and let me stand by faith on heaven’s tableland, a higher plane than I have found: Lord, plant my feet on higher ground. (Hymn – Higher Ground).

Allowing God to "Pop" Us through Trials

2011-11-02T17:30:00.000-07:00

“These (trials) have come so that your faith – of greater worth than gold. . .may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed: (I Peter 1:7).

I enjoy popcorn in any season of the year, but for some reason I associate it with fall and winter the most. Interestingly enough, a recent children’s sermon I heard in church gave me some thoughts on popcorn and my life.

Popcorn must be heated to pop. We all know the sensation of biting down on an unpopped kernel. I have almost lost a few teeth that way! Kernels need to pop to be good. We have also probably tasted popcorn that has been heated too long. In my opinion, nothing smells worse than burned popcorn and it doesn’t taste too good either. The key to perfect popcorn is having it heated for just the right amount of time (and adding some salt and butter of course!).

The “heat” of my earthly trials is going to affect me. If I don’t allow them to “pop” me and accomplish their work, I will not grow in perseverance and maturity (James 1:2-4). Likewise, if I allow my trials to overwhelm me and become overly burdened by them rather than trusting in God’s wisdom, I may get burned.

God is in control of the heat in my life. Just as we should never leave our popcorn unattended on the stove or in the microwave, God never leaves me unattended. He never brings more than I can handle, even if that seems to be the case at the moment. God will sustain me through the pain and sufferings in my life, even when I feel the popping is too painful. And as others look at my life, they may even be able to “taste and see that the Lord is good” (Psalm 34:8).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, may I believe these words in faith today: “When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie, My grace, all-sufficient, shall be thy supply; the flame shall not hurt thee; I only design thy dross to consume and thy gold to refine” (hymn - How Firm A Foundation).

Glorifying God in the "Deaths" of our Pain and Illness

2011-10-11T10:17:00.000-07:00

“I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death”
(Philippians 1:20).

Although I love the fall, I experience mixed feelings during this season. I enjoy the beautiful colors and crisp days, but I physically feel the effects of the colder weather and know that winter is coming. A statement from one of my daughter’s friends impacted me greatly: “I wonder if fall is God’s way of inviting us to consider that the deaths he calls us to can be beautiful” (Alex Kirk).

This thought spoke to me in several ways. One relates to my physical death. When I die I will experience the wonders of my eternal heavenly home and perfect body. But I also realized that these words can apply to my current earthly life. Right now I am surrounded with trees whose leaves are a blaze of color. Yet those leaves will eventually drop off, die, and never return. The trees will appear to be dead but next spring there will be new buds growing in to new leaves. They will not be the same leaves, but they will be beautiful and useful in their own way. Sometimes I feel I am dying to things daily - hopes, dreams, activities, and abilities. I may have periods of what seem to be “deadness”. Yet I can accept these deaths willingly, believing God will bring new buds of purpose to my life - different leaves than before but still beautiful and useful to Him.

There is some sadness in any death, but the deaths that we die due to our pains and illnesses are not the end. As I see the peak of fall’s beauty and then the deadness that follows, I want to remember that a new spring will come. Rather than bringing hopelessness and despair, the deaths I yield to God can and will bring new beauty and glory to Him, now and in eternity.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, may I allow each death I die to bring glory and honor to You. Amen.

Purposeful Pruning

2011-09-28T07:54:00.000-07:00

“He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful”
(John 15:2).

My husband and I recently took a trip to Longwood Gardens in Pennsylvania. Although I was more interested in the flowers, I did see the bonsai display in the huge conservatory. I didn’t know too much about bonsai other than the fact that it involves much pruning and training to achieve the desired appearance. As I looked at the tiny trees, I was amazed to discover that some of the pruning had begun as much as 80 years ago!

Two thoughts came to me as I looked at those incredible plants. As a bonsai tree grows, the pruner must vigorously cut off various branches to develop the right shape and size. Even healthy growth must be cut if is not going in the planned direction. There is also much waiting involved. Sometimes it takes decades for the plant to become what the pruner desires it to be. Once that goal is reached, there will still be maintenance pruning as long as the tree lives.

I realized that my life could be compared to one of those trees, and that God my Father is the patient pruner. He started me from a small seed and has watched me grow for decades. Many times He has cut off unhealthy branches in my life, but He has also cut off what seemed to me to be good growth as well. He will cut what is necessary for my life to take and keep the shape He has designed specifically for me.

Those bonsai trees achieved the purpose for which they were created – to display the creativity and patience of the people who shaped them, as well as to provide enjoyment to those seeing them. If and when I don’t like the pruning and shaping God is doing in my life through my pain, I want to remember that I am being conformed into the perfect image He has chosen just for me. And it is good.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, whether painful for pleasant, help me to trust Your pruning and shaping of my life. Amen.

Courage through the Storm

2011-09-09T08:13:00.000-07:00

“Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid” (Mark 6:50)

We have experienced very severe storms here lately on the east coast. Watching the torrential rains and hearing the severe winds, I remembered a recent sermon our pastor gave.

The above verse is from the story of Jesus walking on the water to the disciples during a storm. Our pastor pointed out something new to me. Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him. The word “made” here means to compel or command. Jesus knew the storm would come, yet he made the disciples go out into the lake. Of course at the time they had no idea what was ahead of them, but Jesus did.

In the throes of this storm, when the disciples saw Jesus walking on the water they were terrified. Jesus’ words, “It is I”, are the same words used by God in the Old Testament when He revealed Himself to Moses as “I AM that I AM”. The Eerdmans Commentary defines this expression as follows: “God will prove himself to be ever dependable and sufficiently resourceful to meet every need.” Jesus was saying to them that He was there with them, in total control of everything – the Great I AM. They were to take courage and not fear.

At times we may question why God would deliberately send us out into the storms of ongoing pain or illness. We may feel He doesn’t care that we are sinking, beaten by the wind and waves. Yet God uses these storms of life to show us who He is. He is our Deliverer, our Savior, and in control of every crashing wave and raging storm that we face. He sometimes has a bigger plan than simply our comfort. He wants to change our hearts so that we will have the courage and faith to trust Him completely, regardless of our circumstances, perhaps impacting others in the process as well. Take courage! Whether He calms our storms or holds us through them, He is still the great I AM.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, give me the courage to trust You through each storm I face, knowing Your power and presence are with me through them all.

Complaints or Creativity

2011-08-03T15:21:00.000-07:00

“You have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator (Colossians 3:9, l0).

Creativity and adaptability have never been my strong points but God is using my health problems to develop these character traits within me.

As my health has deteriorated I have given up various activities and responsibilities, and I am learning to accept these limitations. Yet I am also learning there may be creative ways to work around some weaknesses, rather than complaining and giving up hope.

Some of these adaptations are rather humorous. I have difficulty sleeping so have acquired quite an accumulation of pillows to keep me comfortable. Thankfully our bed is big and my husband is not, or he would be pushed on the floor by the mountain of pillows which varies nightly. Because of back pain, many times I either carry a heating pad or wear an ice pack under my clothes. Finding outlets and hoping I don’t develop leaks can be challenging! I play games with friends and do my computer work on my knees, and my pile of pillows are great knee pads.

These adaptations and others are a work in progress. At times I get very frustrated about all that I can’t do in a “normal” way. But God is using these circumstances to grow me in new ways. God is a God of creativity. We see that in the myriad species of plants, animals, insects, and humanity, ranging in all sizes, shapes, colors, and personalities. We as humans have been created in His likeness. We are not God or gods and never will be, but we possess the attributes and characteristics which He has chosen to give us.

Becoming more creative rather than complaining is one positive aspect of my pain. As I search to find new ways to manage my limitations, I quite possibly may find some God-given treasures along the way.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for renewing me in Your image. Rather than complaining, let me seek Your wisdom in finding the perfect balance of acceptance and creativity in my limitations. Amen.

Our Ebenezers - Signs of God's Faithfulness

2011-08-02T15:51:00.000-07:00

“Then Samuel took a stone and set it up. He named it Ebenezer, saying, “Thus far has the Lord helped us.”
(I Samuel 7:12).

In Scripture stones were sometimes used a symbols of God’s faithfulness. Whether it was deliverance from or victory over their enemies, stones were visual reminders of what God had done in the past and an encouragment to trust Him for the future.

I once experienced a great example of this concept. Our former church was celebrating its 25th anniversary. The pastor asked every family to bring in an item symbolizing some way in which the church had significantly impacted their lives for God. It was a beautiful thing to see all the “stones” that people brought and to relive great shared memories. As I look back over my own life, sometimes I am tempted to only dwell on the painful memories. But I can also choose to remember how the Lord has brought me through each of these experiences, using them to draw me into a deeper and more faithful relationship with Him.

Many times my old fearful nature still struggles within me. When I think of the future I wonder how I will survive my health struggles, and honestly - at that moment - may not even want to try. That is when I need to remember all that God has done for me. For a visual reminder I bought a bag of small stones. I have placed them in certain places to help me remember what the Lord has done throughout my life – on my nightstand, in my makeup drawer, in my wallet, in my car, on the kitchen windowsill. When I seem them I remember God’s faithfulness. He will not fail me now, regardless of what lies ahead. Taking one day at a time and remembering my Ebenezer stones, I am clinging to God - the Rock of my salvation.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, just as the Ebenezers in my life are signs of Your faithfulness to me, so may I be a faithful “living stone” in Your kingdom as I represent You to those around me (I Peter 2:5). Amen.

Speaking the Truth of Scripture to Ourselves

2011-07-29T05:08:00.000-07:00

“It is written:
‘I believed; therefore I have spoken.’ With that same spirit of faith we also believe and therefore speak.”
(II Corinthians 4:13).

Negative self-talk is a real weakness in me. Whether it’s fear about my “pain of the day”, discouragement about my inabilities, battling with depression, or countless other things, many of my thoughts do not fit the description of victorious Christian living.

I am currently working on the Beth Moore Bible study Believing God. She mentions the effectiveness of verbally speaking God’s Word. Of course God’s Word is active when we read or meditate on it silently, but there is something very powerful in verbally speaking His truths. Satan cannot read our minds but he can hear our voice. When God’s Word goes forth, Satan trembles and flees.

If I truly believe God’s Word in faith, speaking it out loud confirms that truth in my spirit. I have seen God work miraculously as I verbalize my faith through Scripture. If I am constantly speaking negative, untrue thoughts to myself, I actually contribute to my health problems and see myself as Satan wants me to rather than as who I am in Christ. Proverbs 15:4 says that the tongue of the wise is a tree of life but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. Many times Satan’s deceitful lies have crushed my spirit – my life is hopeless, I can’t endure this pain any longer, I’m useless and insignificant. But speaking the truth of God’s Word does bring healing – perhaps not physical healing but a healing of my attitude, bringing hope and the ability to persevere with faith.

I have collected various Scriptures that apply to my most difficult struggles. When I am tempted to dwell on negative thoughts, I read aloud the verses that speak truth to that particular situation. God has accomplished mighty things through this action and I trust in faith that He will do more. “The Word that God speaks is alive and full of power (making it active, operative, energizing, and effective)” Hebrews 4:12 AMP. Thank God that His Word never returns void.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me the self-discipline to speak Your Word to myself, for Your Word is truth and Your truth sets me free. Amen.

God's Unfailing Faithfulness through Pain

2011-07-27T12:58:00.000-07:00

“He who called you is faithful; he will surely do it”
(I Thessalonians 5:24 ESV).

One of my biggest weaknesses in my walk with God is my lack of faith in believing that He will bring me through each new trial, regardless of how faithful He has been in the past. I have wanted to increase my faith and trust and recently God gave me two opportunities to do that.

I have had back problems for 25 years but this summer has been especially difficult with the inability to sit for very long. A friend of mine and I had planned a two-day trip and I was to do all the driving. I was very apprehensive, and yet after prayer, felt I should have faith that God would bring me through. I chose specific Scriptures to speak to myself throughout the trip. By the second day I was in a good bit of pain but wanted to trust Him in faith. God truly worked a miracle. He did not remove my pain but He gave me strength to persevere through it and still enjoy things immensely.

Six weeks later we had a trip with our daughters that involved 10 hours of driving in two days as well as sitting for a show. Our girls had planned their vacation times around this trip, and after much prayer, again I didn’t feel I should cancel it. Even after God’s previous provision I still struggled with fear and lack of faith. Once again I took Scriptures with me to speak aloud, reminding me that God is faithful and would bring me through. He did. Miraculously I had virtually no pain the entire trip.

God works differently in each new situation but He is continually performing miracles in our lives of pain. Whether it’s giving total relief for a time or giving the endurance to persevere through it, either way, we win. And perhaps these miracles are more meaningful to our spiritual growth than complete healing could ever be.

Prayer: Gracious God, to the faithful You show Yourself faithful (Psalm 18:25). Help me to see the miracles You work in my life every day and use my pain to increase my faith and trust in You. Amen.

Freedom to Trust God's Decisions for Our Lives

2011-06-28T07:36:00.000-07:00

“If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” (John 8:36).

We live within a few hours of various military bases. I have often thought of the problems I would have experienced in that career because of my difficulty in following orders and directions without understanding their reasons. This attitude has created numerous problems in both my personal and spiritual life.

Over the years it has been hard to accept the ongoing pain and physical problems that God has allowed in my life. I have felt that if I were given an explanation of why this was happening and understood it, I could accept it much more easily. Thankfully my faith and trust in God and His decisions is increasing, but many times I still struggle.

As we approach the Fourth of July, I am reminded of why many wars have been fought – for freedom. In order to reach that goal soldiers had to follow orders and be obedient. If they were like me they might have said. “Why can’t I go in that direction? Why can’t I be with that division? Can you tell me the ultimate goal of the mission?” Chaos would have reigned, battles would not have been won, and freedom would have been lost.

My obedience to God brings me freedom and victory. By yielding to Him and His loving and purposeful plan for my life, I experience freedom from fear, anxiety, hopelessness, discouragement, the need for control, and countless other negative emotions. But I must trust and obey, having the faith to believe that His way is best, regardless of how little I understand it or agree with it at the time. My “commanding officer” has been through basic training here on earth. There is no battle He has not fought personally, so He is well-deserving of my unwavering obedience. Earthly freedom and independence may come and go, but my freedom from sin and its harmful thoughts and behaviors is an eternal independence that I can claim every day. That’s cause for celebration!

Prayer: Lord Jesus, as I thank you for my earthly freedom, I also thank you for the spiritual freedom You give as I walk in trust and obedience to You.

Strengthened and Stretched by Suffering

2011-06-28T07:33:00.000-07:00

“Strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. Make level paths for your feet, so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.”
(Hebrews 12:12, 13).

This summer is not going as planned. We had hopes of taking some trips as well attending various local events, but my major regression with back problems has changed all that. So far my summer has consisted of more pain and physical therapy than pleasure.

My physical therapy includes various strengthening exercises to build up the back muscles since surgery and medications are not options for me. I see some spiritual applications in this process. Just as I am strengthening my back muscles, God is using the difficulties and pain in my life to strengthen my faith and walk with Him. If I continually apply the truths of His Word, reminding myself that He is in total control, has a plan, and will bring me through any and every moment, my “muscles” of faith, peace, hope, and others will be strengthened.

My back muscles are also tight in places so I have stretching exercises to do as well. In the same way, God uses trials to stretch my faith. I can grasp too tightly to the things I think I need, including certain abilities or enjoyable experiences and opportunities. God is stretching me to release these things, reminding me of what is truly important.

I will have to do these back exercises for the rest of my life. I will constantly have to monitor them and adjust them to my changing conditions. I also need to do my spiritual exercises daily, being consistent at staying in God’s Word, praying, and abiding in Christ. I am hoping and praying that before too much longer I can take some trips we planned and enjoy the remainder of the summer. But whatever happens, I know that if I allow God to strengthen and stretch me, I will be in the best shape to face whatever lies ahead.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, please use the pain and disappointments in my life to strengthen my walk with you. Thank you that as I am stretched and strengthened, I will not be spiritually disabled, but rather healed. Amen.

Some "R & R" from God's Word

2011-05-27T04:33:00.000-07:00

“They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations”
(Isaiah 61:4).

For many people, summer brings anticipation of vacations and long-awaited “r & r” – rest and relaxation. While reading this verse in Isaiah, I noticed some other “r” words that benefit me more than any vacation.

This passage describes what God’s redeemed people will do. They will rebuild, restore, and renew. Although I am very familiar with these words, I looked up the definitions again. To rebuild is to remodel extensively or reconstruct with new parts. To restore is to bring back to a former condition, health, or strength. To renew is make fresh or strong again or to revive.

How do these words impact my own life? There are ruinous old thought habits that need to be reconstructed- thought patterns of fear, despair, negativity, and hopelessness. They need to be replaced with the truth of God’s Word which reminds me that God’s Spirit and power are within me, giving me the courage and strength to fight old ways of responding to my problems. Although in this life my body may not be restored to the health of years past, God is able to restore my soul and give me fresh strength to endure my earthly trials until I receive my new and perfect body in eternity. I need God’s Word and Spirit to revive me when I feel I’ve had all I can take of pain, suffering, and disappointment.

Sometimes my health conditions limit my traveling abilities. A summer vacation may not always be a possibility for me. And many times my aches and pains keep me from really feeling restful and relaxed. But these words in Isaiah are truths I can claim regardless of how limited I am, how much pain I’m experiencing, or how devastated I feel my life is. Praise God for His wonderful “R & R’s”!

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me hope and faith to trust You for the rebuilding, restoring, and renewing that I need in my life. Amen.

God's Protective Canopy

2011-05-26T19:58:00.000-07:00

“The Lord God will create. . . a cloud of smoke by day and a glow of flaming fire by night; over all the glory will be a canopy. It will be a shelter and shade from the heat of the day, and a refuge and hiding place form the storm and rain”
(Isaiah 4:5.6)

Each spring my husband puts up a canopy over our patio. It provides a lovely place for me to sit and enjoy my birds and flowers.

When I read the above verse, I think of this canopy. Our patio receives the afternoon sun. During the summer months it would be almost unbearable to sit there without the covering the canopy provides. And although it protects me from the intensity of the heat, I am still able to see and enjoy my surroundings. It is not a suffocating, imprisoning protection at all. God’s covering over me is much the same. He is my shelter and protection from Satan’s attacks of despair and depression. He covers me when I am afraid, gives me room to grow and learn while under His protection, and constantly gives me glimpses of His love and bits of heaven through His creation.

My canopy not only gives me protection from the sun but from the rain as well. When the storms of my life threaten to beat me down and drench me with many negative thoughts and emotions, God’s canopy is there to be my refuge and hiding place.

I think it would have been wonderful to have seen the visible signs of God’s presence in the cloud and smoke. Many times I long for a physical sign from God to encourage me. I may not be able to see my Lord face to face at this moment, but His presence is with me through my pain and suffering even as He was with the Israelites through their desert wanderings. Just as the glory of God’s canopy was their constant companion on their journey, His protective canopy will cover me continually until my longing to see His face is fulfilled.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, help me to willingly accept and follow your path for my life, knowing your loving and protective canopy is always over me. Amen.

A Child of the King

2011-05-02T13:44:00.000-07:00

“You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God”
(I Peter 2:9).

I recently watched the royal wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton. Although I enjoyed the pomp and majesty of the surroundings, what struck me most was the couple themselves. They are a stunning couple – physically attractive and in seemingly excellent health. Part of me rejoiced with them and prayed for God’s blessing in their lives. Yet I must admit part of me struggled with envy, not simply for their surroundings but for their physical health and appearance as well.

As I dealt with these thoughts, God brought to mind some Biblical truths. I remembered that I have access to the throne room of God, who loves me in ways I cannot even comprehend; I am a daughter of the King of the Universe and the Prince of Peace is my constant companion; Buckingham Palace cannot compare to the splendors of my eternal home; the wedding feast of the Lamb will be beyond any earthly banquet I could ever imagine; when I meet my Bridegroom face to face, my body will be perfect and complete inwardly and outwardly.

Part of me still longs to look and feel like this royal couple. Pain, age, and medications have taken a toll on my earthly body. Yet I also know that even now I am clothed with the garments of salvation and arrayed in a robe of righteousness, and have been given a crown of beauty for ashes and a garment of praise for despair (Isaiah 61:3,10). God is enthralled with me (Psalm 45:11) and I am part of God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved (Colossians 3:12).

For those of us who know God, our royal wedding is still to come. Our days of pain and suffering are our preparation for that divine Marriage Supper of the Lamb. May we let perseverance finish its work so that we will be mature and complete, lacking nothing (James 1:4).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, no eye has seen the wonders that You have prepared for me in your eternal kingdom. As I await that day while facing my daily struggles, give me the strength and desire to live as a child worthy of the King. Amen.

Pruned by God through Pain and Suffering

2011-04-15T11:04:00.000-07:00

“I am the vine, and my Father is the gardener. . . every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful” (John 14:1,2).

Spring has sprung beautifully here in Virginia and I am blessed that I am able to take part in a beginner gardening course. We recently discussed pruning and I was reminded of the above verse. As we studied the benefits of pruning, I realized how God’s pruning tools of trials and suffering are for our benefit.

Pruning redirects growth. I need to grow in directions of joy, contentment, hope, and peace , rather than envy, discouragement, bitterness, or self-pity. Pruning thins out extra branches and strengthens the main branches supporting the tree or plant structure. God may remove certain things in my life to show me that He is enough and my strength comes from Him. Pruning rejuvenates old growth. I sometimes need a fresh reminder that God is in control and has the best plan for my life, regardless of how it seems at the moment. I can adopt new outlooks and methods of coping with problems, remembering I am new creation in Christ. Proper pruning encourages fruit growth. God’s purpose is for me to bear fruit for Him whatever my circumstances, and He gives me the strength and ability to do that if I am attached firmly to Him. Pruning shapes the object. Everything that God brings in to my life has the potential of conforming me more to His image so that I am transformed into His likeness (II Corinthians 3:18).

Interestingly enough, a well-pruned tree or bush which is exposed to severe weather will build up stronger supportive tissue and more flexible limbs than those trees which are not under such stress. God’s Spirit helps us to increase in perseverance and endurance through suffering, so that we will become mature in Him (James 1:2-4).

Improper pruning can destroy a plant. Thankfully our God is not a harsh gardener. Our scars show the cuts of His love and care, and He is shaping us perfectly for eternity.

Prayer: O God, You are the perfect pruner. May I yield to Your pruning methods in my life as You shape me for Your glory. Amen.

Navigating the Maze of Pain and Illness

2011-04-04T06:57:00.000-07:00

“You hem me in - behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me”
(Psalm 139:5).

In Elizabeth George’s book, Loving God with All Your Mind, she uses the word picture of our lives being a maze through which God leads us. I found a picture book with photos of some lovely garden mazes. As I looked at the pictures, I thought of the above verse.

Mazes can be beautiful and enjoyable to walk in. Sometimes there are benches where we can rest and enjoy the scenery. The tall hedges can provide a feeling of safety and security. We may walk with others and enjoy trying different paths to see where they lead. Mazes can also be frustrating however. We may go around in circles or down many dead ends which we thought were the way out. We can feel closed in and trapped rather than protected.

For most of us, our lives are probably a mixture of the two experiences. Right now there are many who are experiencing very difficult times. This part of the maze is not enjoyable and it’s easy to feel that God has abandoned us to wander alone. We may feel trapped by our circumstances with seemingly no end in sight to our struggles. Yet God’s hand is still leading us. Sometimes we reach dead ends where He says “no” or “not now”, but He will turn us around and lead us down a new path. He will provide the benches to rest when we can’t take anymore, and He will bring others alongside us at just the right times.

God created the pattern for our individual mazes of life and He will not let us wander aimlessly without Him. He is with us just as He was with Adam and Eve in the garden – a very real, though unseen, presence. We can be confident that He will help us navigate our paths until we reach the exit to our eternal home.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, You have a plan, purpose, and pattern for my life. Thank You that there is no place where Your Spirit does not surround me (Psalm 139), and You will show me the way I should go (Psalm 143:8). Amen.

Apotheosis - Changed to Reflect God through Our Pain

2011-04-04T06:54:00.000-07:00

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord. . .”
(II Corinthians 3:18).

I first read the word “apotheosis” in an advent devotional last year. It means “changed to reflect God” so that we transform our outlook on everyday situations and experiences into opportunities for God to be revealed. I had expectations of living each day with that outlook, but I must admit I have many failures along with successes.

I recently had a medical procedure done and was hoping I would reflect God through it. I managed to make a positive comment on the cross necklace my nurse was wearing, but soon after that dissolved into tears over pain and problems with the IV’s. Such was the extent of my reflection of God’s glory for the day – certainly no great victory.

The next day however, I was praising God for bringing me through this procedure and thanking Him for all those people who touched my life that day. As I prayed, more and more people came to mind: those who developed this test; those who built the equipment and maintain it; the doctors and nurses who spent countless hours studying to perform this procedure; and those who have researched and developed anesthesia – a tremendous blessing for me. I was amazed at how many people in some way had touched my life that morning.

Years ago I would not have had these thoughts. But God has and is using my pain and illness to broaden my perspective and see His hand in ways I never would have seen otherwise. Did I reflect His glory that day at the hospital? Not the way in which I had hoped. But He is transforming my thoughts and that is a beginning. I am learning to see His goodness and glory in new ways because of my pain. By His grace, I pray that transformation will reflect His glory outwardly more and more, molding me into a living “apotheosis” for Him.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, may I see Your reflection in every aspect of my life, including my pain and suffering, and may I then reflect that glory to others. Amen.

God's Loving Guidance

2011-02-10T13:19:00.000-08:00

“In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling” (Exodus 15:13).

I have never been good at making decisions and my health problems make this even more difficult. I have trouble making decisions about medicines. I agonize over committing to activities. There are many things I either want to do or feel I should do. I need God’s guidance continually to make wise choices.

This winter has been especially challenging. Not only do I have my own ongoing health issues, but my parents have had some major life changes requiring my help. I am learning to walk the fine and somewhat precarious line of being a daughter as well as a parent to my aging parents. At times I feel completely overwhelmed.

This verse brings me great comfort. I am reminded that I am redeemed. God has delivered me and set me free, not only from the eternal consequences of sin and death but also from the fears and worries which I so easily bring upon myself. He redeems and saves me daily as well as eternally.

It is God’s strength which will enable me to make wise choices. If for some reason I make a poor one, His strength will bring me through that too, giving me an opportunity to learn and grow from it. And God will guide me – this verse states that fact. God’s strength as well as His love is unfailing. He will never let me down.

If I lift each decision before God in prayer asking for His guidance, then I must move forward, trusting Him for the outcome. At times even the right decisions are difficult to live with, but whatever the outcome, He is in control and can redeem any and every circumstance for my good. He is the sure foundation for my times, a rich source of salvation and wisdom and knowledge (Isaiah 33:6).

Prayer: All the way my Savior leads me; what have I to ask beside? Can I doubt His tender mercy, who thro’ life has been my Guide? Heav’nly peace, divinest comfort, here by faith in Him to dwell! For I know, whate’er befall me, Jesus doeth all things well. (Hymn) Amen.

God's Wings

2011-02-01T05:24:00.000-08:00

“He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge (Psalm 91:4).

I enjoy birds and this winter as I have watched them at my feeders, I have been reminded of some Scripture passages mentioning God’s wings.

God wings provide safety and refuge. In Psalm 17:8 David asked the Lord to hide him in the shadow of His wings, protecting him from danger and attack. I may not have physical enemies attacking me but Satan is continually attacking me with fears, despair, discouragement, and countless other negative thoughts. When I cry out to God for His protection, His Word and Spirit are my refuge.

God’s wings bring healing. Malachi 4:2 says the Son of Righteousness rises with healing in His wings. Although the Lord may not bring me physical healing from all my infirmities, He heals my soul and spirit. He replaces my earthly values and desires with His eternal heavenly ones. He brings me through my times of grief, pain, and suffering, and He restores my soul.

God’s wings offer protection, shelter, and provision. Luke 13:34 tells us how God longed to gather His people under His wings like a mother bird yet they would not come. Most of us have known the comfort and parental provision of food, housing, and other necessities of life. God will meet all of these earthly needs and more.

The wings of God not only provided David with these comforts, but they also provided a place for David to praise Him – “Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings”. We can sing our songs of praise to Him as well, knowing that the warmth and security of His wings covers us even on our most lonely or pain-filled days. They will carry us with the strength we need until He flies us home.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You that Your wings are always there to carry me, care for me, and catch me when I fall (Deuteronomy 32:10, 11). Amen.

Living by Faith and Not by Sight

2010-10-13T03:40:00.000-07:00

“We live by faith and not by sight” (II Corinthians 5:7).

This verse has become more real to me recently. Having fibromyalgia, I go through periods of dealing with pain in a specific location. When one pain disappears, another one replaces it. Right now my eyes are causing visual problems which affect my daily life.

With good vision I am able to be independent of others and, for the most part, can do what I want to do when I want to do it. I can see where I’m going as well as where I don’t want to go. I feel I am in control of my life and can plan accordingly. My current vision problem has changed some of those situations and I have become frustrated and fearful.

I can relate this physical situation to my spiritual life. When I live by sight only, I want God’s help and guidance for my life, but I am relying on what I see as well. I am more in control and may question God if I don’t care for the direction He is taking me. I prefer tangible signs to guide me, and I may even ignore His leading and go my own way at times.

Living by faith however means that I allow God to lead me, sometimes not knowing where I am going. The unknown can be a fearful place when I can’t see what lies ahead. Yet that is what God asks me to do – trusting Him completely, walking confidently with Him even when I don’t know where the next step will take me, and giving Him total control of my life.

I am praying that my physical vision will be completely restored soon. It would make my life easier and more enjoyable. As for my spiritual vision, I need only see far enough to find Christ – just one step ahead.

Prayer: All the way my Savior leads me – what have I to ask beside? Can I doubt His tender mercy, who through life has been my guide? Heavenly peace, divinest comfort, here by faith in Him to dwell! For I know, what-e’er befall me, Jesus doeth all things well (Hymn). Amen.

Singing a New Song

2010-10-02T14:43:00.000-07:00

“He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God”
(Psalm 40:3).

I have always enjoyed music and have been blessed to participate on worship teams at church for a good many years. We began attending a new church several years ago, and we do not sing most of the songs that I sang in the past. I miss those old songs greatly, yet I am learning to love the new ones. Acceptance, however, has taken time.

I can compare my life to these songs. I loved the “songs” of my past – my work, my children at home, and my physical abilities and activities. Not every song was a joyous song of praise, but many of my tunes were positive rather than negative. Now I have to move on to new songs not only in church but in my personal life as well. Circumstances and health are different.

There was a time when even my old songs were new to me. They took time to learn and grow to love. The same is true for my new songs. It takes time, patience, faith and trust in God, and even some creativity to learn these new words and melodies. Adapting to change is challenging, but just as I am learning to love and enjoy singing new musical songs, God is helping me adapt and adjust to new phases of life. God’s great love and compassion bring at least a few beautiful notes to even the hardest of days.

One day I will sing the old, the current, and the yet unknown songs of praise, together with countless other believers, in my eternal home. God only writes beautiful music. For now, may I see each new day and new stage of my life as an opportunity to sing new melodies. It’s time to start learning the new songs He’s written just for me.

Prayer: O God, give me the strength and the willingness to sing each new song You give to me, returning these songs to You as my gift of praise. Amen.

Weaving a Basket of Faith

2010-08-31T12:06:00.000-07:00

“Everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith” (I John 5:4).

One Sunday our pastor spoke on the Old Testament story of Moses and the basket that his mother Jochabed made for him. In faith she wove this basket to hide him among the reeds, hoping that the life of her son would be saved from Pharaoh’s death edict. Her basket ultimately saved not only her son but the entire Israelite nation as well when Moses delivered them out of Egypt.

I began thinking about my life of illness and pain and how it has affected my faith. When I first began dealing with these issues, my faith was quite weak. I doubted God’s wisdom in allowing many difficulties and disappointments. The faith basket I began weaving was very small – barely large enough to grasp during my times of turmoil – but it kept me from totally sinking. As I have continued on this journey with God over the years, my weaving skills have increased. I still have holes of weakness, but the weaving is tighter and my hands are tougher now than when I began. Through the years of suffering this basket has grown. It is still not large enough to keep me from falling out every now and then, but it keeps me afloat through the rapids and waves that pain and suffering bring.

Just as God used Jochabed’s basket of protection for deliverance from death, He is using my basket of faith for deliverance from my fears, discouragement, and hopelessness. Every aspect of my life is an opportunity to enlarge and strengthen this basket, provided I am willing to keep weaving. Many times I become tired and want my basket to be finished. One day it will be done. This basket of faith will carry me right to the shores of eternity, and I will go from faith to sight – into the arms of God. Until then, He and I will keep weaving.

Prayer: Gracious God, give me the strength as well as the desire to continue weaving and walking this life of faith, trusting You each and every moment until I see your face. Amen.

Waves of Doubt

2010-08-03T08:26:00.001-07:00

“When he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” (James 1:6).

Our family has always enjoyed the beach. In years past I loved riding a good wave in to the shore. On our last trip however, things were different. I tried swimming out in the ocean but was sucked under by a wave. I tried standing in the water but the strength needed to maintain my balance was too difficult for me. I spent the remainder of the trip looking at the ocean rather than being in it.

Many of us may know the sensation of being pulled under and tossed by a breaking wave. It can be frightening as well as dangerous. When I doubt or question God and His faithfulness, I may experience similar feelings. There are countless times when I am worried, anxious, fearful, or discouraged about my health or circumstances. I pray for peace or guidance but then continually dwell on my concerns, not leaving the results in God’s hands. This causes unnecessary turmoil within me, and I feel blown and tossed by the waves of my emotions and doubts. God will bring about what He has planned and give me the grace and mercy to handle whatever may come. I need to leave my requests with Him rather than continually taking them back.

On those beach trips years ago, I not only enjoyed riding a few crests in to shore but also swimming out beyond them to float on the gentle waves. That is where I need to be now - lifted up on the peaceful swells of faith and trust, rather than dragged to shore by the crashing breakers of my doubts.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me the faith to totally trust You for what is happening in my life and body, for You do not speak and then not act. You do not promise and then not fulfill (Numbers 23:19). Amen.

Taste and See the Sweetness of God

2010-06-21T08:36:00.000-07:00

"Taste and see that the Lord is good" (Psalm 34:8).

I have always been a tea drinker, but my cup usually consisted of a little tea with a large amount of sugar and cream . Because of developing sugar intolerances I stopped drinking tea for awhile since it tasted too bitter. Recently however I have discovered many different teas with unique flavors which I am learning to enjoy without the extras.

As I was reading this verse I realized some interesting truths. In my healthy years as a Christian I certainly loved God, but I was quite caught up in the “sugar and cream” of life – all the many things I could do and enjoy on my own without giving much thought or thanks to God. When those things were removed, life seemed very bitter. Just as I am learning to enjoy my teas and appreciate them alone, savoring their taste and aroma along with the peace and comfort they bring to my day, so I am also learning to savor God alone, without all the extras in life that I once had.

There are mornings when I do add a little sugar and cream to my tea, which I can tolerate in small doses. Those cups are so enjoyable! In the same way God gives me times when I enjoy a special outing, trip, or activity. I appreciate these sweet times even as I accept the fact that they are not daily occurrences.

Some teas and some days still seem bitter and I miss my “extras”. I may never lose my taste for sugar and cream completely, but as I continue to develop my new tastes and new attitudes, I am experiencing the sweetness of knowing that God is indeed good and He is enough.

Prayer: Dear Lord, help me to see all the sweetness and completeness that Your presence brings into my life, and to believe the truth that those who seek You truly lack no good thing. Amen.

Divine Power

2010-06-17T10:32:00.000-07:00

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness, through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness”
(II Peter 1:3).

Many times I put limitations on this verse, depending on the kind of day I am experiencing.
There are the great days – days when I feel well physically and emotionally and am able to enjoy life. These days are sometimes few and far between, and when they come, are very precious. There are the trying days - days when I feel well but circumstances are difficult, from the insignificant to the overwhelming. Then there are the hard days – days of pain and discouragement, when all I can do is to endure and breathe a sigh relief when it ends.

All of these days have a common thread – God’s power to get me through them well. I love the all-encompassing word “everything” in this verse. There is no day, no circumstance, no pain that His power is incapable of handling. In John 16:33, Christ said we would have trouble in this world, but He has overcome it. We forget that we have “his incomparably great power. . . which he [God] exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead” (Ephesians 1:19,20). That resurrection power is within believers every moment of every day through the Holy Spirit.

On a great day, we can praise God and sail along, enjoying the blessedness of it. On a difficult day, we can cling in faith to the fact that He will get us through, giving us a memory to draw upon the next time we are sinking. No day is too difficult for God. “I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?” (Jeremiah 32:27). Praise God, there is not.

Prayer: Mighty God, thank you that all of my days are ordained by You and that nothing in my life is beyond Your control. Help me to live victoriously, relying on Your great power within me. Amen.

Deliverance or Survival

2010-05-28T12:51:00.000-07:00

“The eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine" (Psalm 33:18, 19).

This verse speaks to me of two possible scenarios - times when God totally delivers us from difficult situations and times when He brings us through them. I prefer deliverance, but that is not always best for my spiritual growth.

I recently visited one of my daughters. The five hour drive was challenging, but God enabled me to do it. Of course I was hoping to feel well during my visit since we had an agenda of activities. I developed a headache on my drive there. By the evening it was a severe migraine which stayed with me for my entire trip, despite medication. God gave me brief times of reprieve, but He never removed it. The headache left the day I came home.

In previous years, my plea during such an excruciating time would have been for deliverance only. I would have viewed this trip as a total loss, even though I was able to do all the activities I had planned and enjoyed them as much as possible. God did not deliver me, but He kept me alive through my “famine”. Surviving a famine may not be pleasant. This Scripture does not promise abundant food that is easily accessible, but it does promise provision.

I am learning to pray for endurance as well as deliverance. I must believe in faith that whatever method God chooses for each circumstance is best. This experience was another step on my journey of pain with the Lord and it was a victory, although not an easy one. The ultimate deliverance is coming. For now the ability to persevere and survive can be just as much of a miracle as deliverance. This was one of those times, and I will not forget it.

Prayer: O Joy that seeekest me through pain, I cannot close my heart to Thee; I trace the rainbow through the rain, and feel the promise is not vain that morn shall tearless be (Hymn "O Love That Will Not Let Go"). Amen.

Positive Deposits and Temporary Negatives

2010-05-17T09:57:00.001-07:00

“Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance. . .”
(Ephesians 1:13, 14)

“What is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (II Corinthians 4:18).

Depression is an ongoing battle for me. I am unable to take antidepressants, so each new wave is a struggle to withstand. Friends have suggested that I have a pre-planned strategy to handle these depressive cycles.

As I was reading the above verse about the Holy Spirit, I began thinking of the concept of deposits. One definition of a deposit is a partial payment. I decided to keep a list of all the partial payments, or “little glimpses of eternity”, that God brings in to my life every day. These are my positives. I also remembered that my struggles are temporary, although right now they seem endless. I listed my trials as temporary negatives.

Keeping this daily list has been a tremendous help to my outlook. I am amazed at the many heavenly deposits I am given. Even small things can bring such joy if I allow them to - a bird at my feeder, a rabbit in our yard, a good cup of tea, a phone call from my daughter, quiet time outside with God on a lovely morning, and many, many more.

Now when the suffocating heaviness of depression weighs me down, I think of my deposits and remind myself that the trials are temporary. Although I may struggle with depression here on earth, it is indeed temporary in the light of eternity. I do have to walk through fire in this life, but I have God’s word that I will not be consumed by it (Isaiah 43:2). His loving presence and comfort are shown in each sign of heaven on earth.

Prayer: Gracious God, thank You for the many ways You reveal yourself to me daily. Thank You for the hope of knowing that one day I will receive my full inheritance, and until that day, Your strength will carry me through my temporary earthly sufferings. Amen.

Like A Well-Watered Garden

2010-05-10T13:52:00.000-07:00

“The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail” (Isaiah 58:11).

Despite my physical limitations I enjoy gardening. Most of it is container gardening and I can only work at it for short amounts of time, but enjoying God’s handiwork in plants and flowers is very satisfying to me.

The above verse is a wonderful word picture for life. Countless times when I wake up in the morning, I feel sun-scorched and dry rather than well-watered and fresh to meet a new day. Whether it is due to another night of limited sleep or just weariness from daily pain, many of us know the feeling of waking up more tired than when we went to bed the night before.

What a different picture a garden represents – alive, green, vibrant, easily swaying with the breezes, and fragrant. God’s Word says we will be like that. Psalm 1 and Jeremiah 17 both state that those who trust in the Lord will be like a tree planted by a stream, whose leaves will not wither even when the heat comes. At times I ask, “Lord, how can that be possible?”

God is our bountiful reservoir of life-giving water. His Holy Spirit channels that water into us, renewing and rejuvenating us as it flows. According to God’s Word, He gives all of us this water, no matter how weak, insignificant, or useless we feel on a given day. Somehow today He can refresh us so that we can refresh others - through prayer, physical, or verbal encounters - making our lives gardens of praise for His glory.

Prayer: Father, when I am dry, water the garden plot of my life with Your Holy Spirit. May I feel your presence flowing through me, allowing me to be the fragrance of Christ to others. Amen.

My Water Supply

2010-05-07T04:11:00.000-07:00

“They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water" (Jeremiah 2:13).

I love birds and enjoy watching them at my feeders and birdbath. One birdbath that I would like to own has a fountain in it, providing continual fresh water for the birds. The flowing water attracts them and is healthy for them as well. Cisterns, like birdbaths, store water. If a cistern’s walls are cracked or broken, it will not hold water. Any water it may hold temporarily becomes tainted with impurities.

There are many Scriptures associating God with water. Obeying His commands brings peace like a river and righteousness likes the waves of the sea (Isaiah 48:18). Those who trust in Him are like trees planted by a stream, bearing fruit even in times of drought (Jeremiah 17:8). Drinking of His living water brings salvation and eternal life (John 4:14).

Just as my birds need fresh water to drink, I need God’s living water to sustain me, particularly through the droughts which pain and illness bring. Yet many times I dig and drink from the untruths of cracked cisterns whose waters are bitter and unhealthy. I have chosen fear and worry over my circumstances, rather than trusting God and seeking His peace. I have believed that pills are the only answer to my suffering, looking desperately to them for relief. Although medications can be a tremendous blessing, my faith should be in God and not in them. I have placed unrealistic expectations on friends, family, and physicians, forgetting that only God will never disappoint or fail me.

Streams of love, mercy, faithfulness, compassion, joy, power, and strength are continually flowing from the fountain of God. Why would I not choose this fresh and living water rather than the bitter waters of my cracked cisterns? As I spend time in His Word, this water will fill me, satisfy me, and flow from within me (John 7:38).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, help me to choose the life-giving truths springing from the fountain of Your Word, rather than the stagnant waters of my false beliefs. Amen.

Gardened for God

2010-04-29T03:58:00.000-07:00

“Land that drinks in the rain often falling on it and that produces a crop useful to those for whom it is farmed receives the blessing of God” (Hebrews 6:7).

I have not had much experience with farming, but I know enough about gardening to see an interesting lesson for myself in this verse.

If the “land” of my life is going to produce crops, it must first be tilled. This involves using sharp tools, such as my pain and illnesses, to dig up and remove anything that would hinder my spiritual growth. I do not enjoy the process of being tilled and hoed, but God knows what needs to be removed, including the idol I sometimes make of good health. He then plants His seeds of perseverance, joy, patience, thanksgiving, faith, and others.

Once God plants these seeds, I face other challenges in order to grow. The rains do not always come in gentle showers but may also come in heavy floods, taking days to absorb. The sun does not always shine with comforting warmth but with an intense and scorching heat. Soft breezes can become fierce gales. Yet God controls the elements in my life just as He controls the elements in nature. He knows that by His power I am capable of producing these crops of fruit for Him, even in weakness and pain. If I allow whatever wind, sun, and rain He sends to bring growth, God will honor and bless that. Perhaps the blessing will not be in the form of my choosing at this moment, but He will bring it.

The Lord has called each of us to bear fruit that will last (John 15:16). The blessing that comes from being obedient to that calling, regardless of the obstacles we face, includes a peace and contentment that the world can neither give nor understand. He will sustain us through any conditions until He harvests us home.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, may I willingly allow You to be my life’s gardener. Use my weaknesses to produce fruit for You as I abide in You. Amen.

The Fragrant Sacrifice of Praise through Pain

2010-04-18T06:53:00.001-07:00

“But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him” (II Corinthians 2:14).

I recently re-read the New Testament story of Mary of Bethany (John 12:8), who annointed Jesus with expensive perfume before His death. I began thinking of how much I wanted to offer a gift to the Lord that would be as touchingly beautiful and fragrant as Mary’s was.

I thought of Mary’s gift. It was a sacrifice in several respects. The expense alone was worth a year’s salary. I imagine she had to give up some wants and perhaps even some needs to pay for it. Although our giving may not be of great monetary value, those of us with chronic health problems are continually giving up activities, hopes, desires, and dreams. We can give them up grudgingly and despairingly, or we can yield them willingly and gladly, even though our hearts are breaking in the process.

Mary also faced criticism and misunderstanding from those around her for her extravagant gift. We sometimes face the insensitivities and criticisms of those who do not understand our limitations. We do not need to feel guilty for what we cannot give. God knows our limitations. Praying for others, keeping positive attitudes, and having thankful hearts even as we are suffering are as honoring and significant to Him as the physical acts of service that healthier people may give.

When Mary poured out the fragrant perfume, the aroma spread to all those present. As we offer our willingness and perseverance to praise God through our pain, the fragrance of that sacrifice can reach others. They are able to see God’s faithfulness to His children through all circumstances as the mighty power of His Spirit works in us, bringing us comfort, peace, and strength. Pouring out our lives of suffering as a gift of love to the Lord may be as sacrificial to Him as the gift Mary gave.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, give me a willing heart to offer my sacrifice of praise through pain. May it become the fragrance of Christ to those around me. Amen.

God Meant It for Good

2010-04-13T05:33:00.000-07:00

"As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good"
(Genesis 50:20 NASB).

I currently volunteer with an English for Speakers of Other Languages program. I am thankful that I am physically able to do this despite my health problems. Communication, however, has been quite challenging. I questioned why the Tower of Babel had to result in language barriers. Couldn’t God have used another way to deal with man’s pride and arrogance? Then I realized that because of this language barrier, I have the opportunity to show God’s love and minister to other people, just as missionaries all over the world are doing. Joseph spoke the words in the above verse to his brothers after his years of enslavement and subsequent rise to power in Egypt. His wisdom brought Egypt through a devastating famine. In both of these examples, we see God bringing good out of what appeared to be bad situations.

I applied this concept to my health struggles. Satan has meant them for evil, knowing that they negatively affect my faith, hope, and trust in God. Yet God can use these trials for my good if I will allow Him to do so. This quote expresses that fact: “There is no situation so chaotic that God cannot from that situation create something that is surpassingly good. He did it at creation. He did it at the cross. He is doing it today” (Bishop Glyn Moule). I can also say He is doing it in my life. I am not the same person physically that I was twenty-five years ago, but I am not the same person spiritually either. I have a dependency on God and a depth to my faith that I might not have experienced were it not for my physical problems.

When I become discouraged, believing that my sufferings are victories for the enemy, I need to remember that nothing is ever a lost cause with God. Perhaps He is even using these struggles to help others, just as He did with Joseph.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, help me to embrace the truth that everything You allow in my life is for my good and for Your glory. Amen.

Knowing Christ in Suffering and Resurrection

2010-04-03T05:17:00.000-07:00

“I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead”
(Philippians 3:10,11).

Throughout my life I have struggled with this verse. I want very much to share in Christ’s resurrection. Sharing in His sufferings, however, is less appealing.

Until my chronic health conditions began, I truthfully wanted no part of Christ’s sufferings – at least no major suffering. I thought I could endure the small inconveniences of life and even the more difficult situations related to child-rearing and financial crises. But when suffering involved physical pain, I preferred to bypass that altogether.

Now that I live with daily pain and frequent sickness, this passage has taken on an entirely new meaning. Although my pain cannot compare to what Christ endured on the cross, it enables me to identify in a small way with what He experienced. In my times of greatest pain, Christ has been the nearest. I have felt His peace and presence during my most agonizing moments, assuring me I would survive and did not need to panic. Other times I have felt tremendous power flowing from the prayers of those around me, carrying me through times of trial.

The wonderful aspect of this verse is that resurrection does come. After the agony of Gethsemane and Calvary, Christ rose in glory and is resplendent in heaven even now. Our pains and sufferings will one day explode into pain-free resurrection. We will be perfect and healthy.

Until then, my trials are a constant reminder of the One who loves me most. I want to be thankful that I have someone who has gone before me on this journey of suffering. He understands my pain as no one else can. He is with me through it now, and will one day raise me to my resurrection wholeness. Hallelujah!

Prayer: Lord Jesus, let me feel the joy of Your glorious resurrection in this earthly life. Draw me ever deeper into knowing You, in sickness and in health. Amen.

Our Gethsemanes

2010-03-29T05:13:00.000-07:00

“Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42).

I once read a book by Max Lucado entitled The Final Week of Jesus. These sentences impacted me greatly: “He (Jesus) saw you in your Garden of Gethsemane –and he didn’t want you to be alone. Most of all, he knows what it’s like to beg God to change his mind and to hear God say so gently, but firmly, ‘No’. For that is what God says to Jesus. And Jesus accepts the answer.”

In the garden that night, Jesus agonized over His upcoming destiny. It was planned and ordained by the Father and Christ was obedient. But for those few brief hours He pleaded for another way. How many times have I pleaded with God to give me another way of growing and learning? How often have I said, “Lord, I want to be compassionate and caring and to work for Your kingdom, but I could do so much more if I were healthy and well!”? How often have I felt that I was appreciative enough of the pain Jesus endured for me without my enduring any more? And I have asked God to make another way.

As of this moment, God’s answer to me is still “no”. Perhaps that will change, but perhaps it won’t. Jesus knew what it meant to endure the unendurable. He did it and He did it alone. What I face is not faced alone. Christ is interceding for me before the Father even now. I have a high priest who is completely able to understand my weaknesses. If I approach the throne of grace with confidence, I will receive mercy and find grace to help me in my time of need (Hebrews 4:15). Just as God’s “no” to Jesus accomplished marvelous things for eternity – man’s salvation – so His “no” to me may be accomplishing some small or great purpose in His divine plan.

The next time I am in the throes of pain, depression, discouragement, or despair, I hope to remember Christ’s Gethsemane. Because of His, He understands mine. And if the answer is still “no”, He will give me the grace to bear it, never leaving my side.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, when I face my Gethsemanes, I know You are there. Thank You for giving me Your peace and presence through all the times in my life when the answer is “no”. Amen.

Spring Renewal

2010-03-16T12:22:00.000-07:00

“You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires, to be made new in the attitude of your minds, and to put on the new self…” (Ephesians 4:22-24).

Winter is a challenging season for me. Cold weather and shorter days affect me physically and mentally. I am always quite ready for the first signs of spring. The world becomes fresh and new as the cold, brown deadness of winter sprouts into the warm, green aliveness of spring.

Just as springtime brings hope to the earth, this verse brings hope to my soul. My old nature is controlled by many deceitful desires including envy, self-pity, anger, and despair. I am to be made new “in the attitude of my mind”. My mind is sometimes a greater enemy than my body. My mind dwells on past abilities and judgmental attitudes towards others. My mind tells me God is not always good or faithful. My mind says this painful life is too difficult to bear.

I need to renew my mind. God will give me the strength to do this, but it takes willing effort on my part as well. I must constantly monitor my thoughts, evaluating not only where they are coming from but where they are leading me. If they are not Scriptural I need to put them from my mind rather than dwelling on them, allowing them to pull me in a wrong direction.

God’s word says that the mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace. (Romans 8:6). I want life and peace. I want renewal. When I see flowers blooming and grass growing, I want to remember that as a new creature in Christ, my old ways of thinking can be replaced with the new. Spring can happen within me as well as around me.

Prayer: O God, as You fill the earth with the freshness of Your beauty, fill my mind with the freshness of Your thoughts. By Your power may I be transformed by the renewing of my mind. Amen.

My Divine Comforter

2010-03-12T06:26:00.000-08:00

“I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever – the Spirit of truth. . . you know him for he lives with you and will be in you” (John 14:16,17).

There are times when I have become very burdened by the trials that some of my fellow believers must endure. As I have prayed for God’s Spirit to sustain them, I have been reminded of the Holy Spirit’s work in my own life, and how pain and illness have brought me a new awareness of and relationship with Him.

In difficult times the Holy Spirit brings an appropriate Scripture song or verse to mind. In moments of extreme pain He brings endurance and encouragement. When grieving the losses of abilities or loved ones, He reminds me that my eternal future will be filled with glorious activity and freedom from partings. When I need to make decisions concerning my health or circumstances, the Holy Spirit gives wisdom and insight, either directly, through others, or through His Word. When growth and change come in to my life, He gives me the assurance that God’s grace will be sufficient to handle them. When I am pulled down into the mire of depression, He prompts me to reach out to others rather than dwelling on myself.

I cannot imagine going through life – particularly one of pain and suffering –without the wonderful presence of the Holy Spirit. Living on this side of the cross, we have His presence on a continual basis. He is a special gift from the Father and the Son to help us through this earthly life until we see our Lord face to face. I am sure His work will not end then, and it will be exciting to see His ministry throughout eternity. For now however, we can rejoice in knowing that wherever we go and whatever we are experiencing, His presence is with us continually.

Prayer: O Lord, thank you that You have not left me comfortless in this life, but have given me the wonderful indwelling of the Holy Spirit living in and through me. Whatever I face in this life, I know that Your Spirit is with me, holding me fast. Amen.

A Heavenly Perspective on an Earthly Life

2010-02-28T14:11:00.001-08:00

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has ever conceived what God has prepared for those who love him” (I Corinthians 2:9).

I recently read the book Heaven by Randy Alcorn. This topic can give me hope and encouragement for my eternal future. However, I can also focus too intently on “going home”. Initially I found myself doing that, yet as I continued reading, God changed my perspective on my earthly life while yearning for my heavenly one.

I constantly face negative thoughts and emotions concerning my limitations. I mourn the loss of old abilities and new activities. As I dwelt on those thoughts, God reminded me of a wonderful truth. I will have an endless eternity to enjoy those things and much more. When I think of the places I would like to visit now, they cannot compare to the beauty I will see daily on the new earth. When I think of the gardening I would love to do, I know that the flowers I grow on the new earth will be more incredibly beautiful than any here. I will experience all this and more in a perfect, pain-free body, and the Lord Jesus will be there enjoying it with me.

Everything that God brings into my life on this earth is for a purpose. There are lessons I need to learn, traits I need to strengthen and develop, and work I have been given to do here and now. God knows that all of these things are necessary training for the wonderful life that lies ahead.

There will still be moments when I struggle with my desires. Yet by God’s grace and power, I can move on to that eternal perspective. There will come a time when these days of suffering are only a distant memory. Now they are preparing me for an unending life with God that is beyond my most wonderful imaginings.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for the blessed hope of my eternal future. Remind me that the losses I grieve now are only shadows of the glories to come, and help me to willingly accept the ways You choose to prepare me for those wonders. Amen.

Inwardly We Are Being Renewed

2010-02-28T13:47:00.000-08:00

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, inwardly we are being renewed day by day” (II Corinthians 4:16).

What an encouragement this passage is! Pain ages me. Some days I feel that I’m wasting away more than others. Pain and trials have caused me to lose that light-hearted, optimistic, and youthful outlook on life. Cynicism, hopelessness, and drudgery can fill my days if I allow them to do so. Physical limitations make me feel older than I am. The latest magazines and books leave me feeling discouraged and disheartened, since I am unable to follow the regimen of physical activity and supplements to keep me “in shape” and “be a younger me.”

Yet God does a wonderful thing inwardly. As I look to Him each day, He restores peace; “May the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way" (II Thessalonians 3:16). He renews hope; “May our Lord Jesus Christ himself . . . who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts" (II Thessalonians 2:16). He releases fears; “Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you" (Joshua 1:9). He reminds me of who and whose I am; “Look to the rock from which you are cut and the quarry from which you are hewn" (Isaiah 51:1). Although I am aging physically, my spirit is becoming younger and more alive than it has ever been.

We cannot stop the effects of illness and pain on our physical bodies, but by God’s power we can keep it from destroying our spirits. As our spirits are renewed, we understand an even deeper meaning to being a new creation in Christ. We can look forward with great anticipation to the new bodies that await us in eternity. Until then, we can continue to “be made new in the attitude of our minds, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:23,24). That is worth far more than any gym workout, health supplement or beauty treatment could ever be.

Prayer: Uplift my spirit today Lord, reminding me that You see me not as I am now, but as I will be in eternity. As I wait on You, renew my strength to live for You in this season of my life. Amen.

I Will Always Have Hope

2010-02-28T13:45:00.001-08:00

“But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more. My mouth will tell of your righteousness, of your salvation all day long, though I know not its measure”
(Psalm 71:14,15).

Hope is a dichotomous word to me. I have had positive experiences with hope – pleasant expectations fulfilled, desires satisfied, pain relieved, and my eternal future secured. I have also had negative experiences – another drug that didn’t help me, a new doctor who had no answers, another activity in which I was unable to participate, another cycle of pain/panic/depression. Sometimes I have felt as though my hope was gone and could never be brought back. I was too beaten down by this life.

The dictionary states that hope is to trust or rely on something, or a desire accompanied by expectation. In whom or what am I placing my hope? If it is a person, treatment, or pill, it may or may not be fulfilled. If it is in the Lord, it will always be satisfied. After days, weeks, or even months of no improvement or relief from struggles, it becomes easy to give up all hope. I may become fearful and despairing about the future during this earthly life. Recently a passage in the Old Testament came to mind. When God gave the Israelites manna, He gave them only enough for that day except on the day before the Sabbath. If they collected too much, doubting that God would provide the next day, it rotted and was worthless. God wanted them to believe that He would provide enough – daily. Daily is the key. God gives me hope for one day at a time. Each new morning, if I put my trust in Him for whatever the day may bring, the Holy Spirit will give me fresh hope.

When that happens I also experience another aspect of His salvation, which is His saving grace to bring me through the day. I realize I truly cannot comprehend its measure, but it is enough for today and that is all I need. It is all any of us need. “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Romans 15:13).

Prayer: Gracious Lord, how comforting it is to know that my hope will never be disappointed when that hope is in You. Renew and refresh that hope today. Amen.

Choosing the Right Path

2010-02-20T15:29:00.000-08:00

“Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. Do not swerve to the right or the left” (Proverbs 4:25-27).

Some time ago, I attempted a short hike with my husband. Although the path was not long, it was somewhat rocky and uneven. After walking for a brief time, I began experiencing such back pain that I was unable to continue. We then tried another path, but became bogged down in mud. We ended our hiking and enjoyed a scenic drive instead.

This verse reminds me of that experience. My wandering eyes can draw me down paths of examining other people’s activities and abilities. I also have moments when I am tempted to look backward, getting pulled down into the memories of my past life and the health I possessed then.

These directions will not keep me on firm ground, but rather will lead me to envy, discontent, and discouragement. An annotation to the above verse reads, “Consider the paths for your feet”. Where I choose to walk is a choice I must make. Every day, I can choose the firm direction of God’s Word and truth, having the assurance that He knows what is best for my life and is guiding and sustaining me as I walk. If I choose the uneven paths of comparing myself to others or of looking back, I become more lame and disabled (Hebrews 12:13).

Although Christ’s path is level and firm, it is not always easy. Yet His Word says that though I stumble I will not fall, for He upholds me with His hand (Psalm 37:23). He will broaden my path and keep my ankles from turning (Psalm 18:36). I want to finish this walk of life and arrive at my heavenly destination in victory, not defeat. By fixing my eyes on Jesus, I’m going to make it (Hebrews 12:2).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me the faith to trust in Your direction for my life, rather than my own understanding. As I commit my way to You, You will direct my paths. (Proverbs 3:5,6). Amen.

A Delightful Inheritance

2010-02-14T16:16:00.000-08:00

“Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. . . surely I have a delightful inheritance”
(Psalm 16:5,6).

The word “inheritance” brings pleasant pictures to my mind. I think of lovely antiques, heirloom jewelry, and perhaps an unexpected sum of money! Our spiritual inheritance is of far greater worth than any earthly one could be.

At times in this life, with this imperfect body, I am not content with my portion and cup. I would prefer something different. Yet Scripture says the Lord “assigned” this cup to me. If God chose the paths for my life, and if I truly believe in and trust Him for my ultimate good, then I should accept my cup willingly. He is all I need to satisfy my desires in every way.

This passage also states that the Lord has made my lot secure. He is in control of my destiny – past, present, and future. I know where my eternal future lies, but I also know He will be with me through everything I face in this life. I am not alone.

Truly I do have a delightful inheritance. Unlike an earthly one, I do not need to wait for someone’s death to receive it. The death took place years ago at Calvary. The gifts are mine, waiting for me accept them. God’s presence is with me daily - surrounding me, protecting me, guiding me, and loving me. In pain and pleasure, He is there to bring hope, joy, comfort, and peace. I can exclaim with the psalmist, “Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure” (Psalm 16:9). As I go through this life, may I be reminded of all He has given me even now, and rejoice.

Prayer: Gracious God, You have shown me the path of life. In Your presence is fullness of joy and in Your right hand are pleasures evermore. Thank you that You are my most precious inheritance. Amen.

Keeping Our Lamps Lit

2010-01-29T16:14:00.000-08:00

“You, O Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light” (Psalm 18:28).

As much as I appreciate modern electricity, there is something very comforting and peaceful about old-fashioned oil lamps. I have a small one I purchased from a yard sale, and I enjoy simply looking at it. It does require some effort to keep it burning however. Without maintaining a full supply of oil in the base, the wick will not burn. Although shaped differently, Biblical lamps burned in the same way.

Just as these lamps need oil to continue burning, so I need the edifying and encouraging oil of God’s Word to keep my light burning. When I neglect to fill my life with His presence, through the reading of His Word and prayer, I eventually burn out. On those days, I grope about in the darkness of anxiety, fear, and despondency. I need to maintain that oil supply to see my way through life, particularly on painful or difficult days.

In Biblical times, these oil lamps were the only source of artificial light and often continued burning throughout the night. A darkened house was a sign of abandonment. If I do not keep my life filled with the truths of God’s Word at all times, I will feel abandoned and alone in my struggles. The oil supply is not lacking, but I have neglected to replenish it.

I have paraphrased the Eerdmans Commentary on this verse, because I thought the main concept was expressed so well: The key to David’s life was the Lord my God. The indwelling light and power of God’s presence maintained the burning glow of his daily life, as well as giving the power and motivation to overcome difficulties. The indwelling presence of our wonderful God truly is the continual light source we need for our everyday lives as well as for our intense times of trial. There will always be more than enough oil for our lamps if we continue to fill them.

Prayer: O Lord, thank you for the sustaining oil of Your Word and Your presence, which illuminates my life. Keep me faithful and consistent to remain filled with You. Amen.

Being Made Holy

2010-01-27T12:31:00.000-08:00

“By one sacrifice, He has made perfect forever those who are being made holy”
(Hebrews 10:14).

It is difficult for me to understand that God sees me now as the perfect creation I will be in eternity. Yet because of Christ’s sacrifice, my eternal perfection has already been accomplished. Now, in this earthly life, I am being made holy. I would much rather be made perfect now and be made holy in the future, but that is not God’s plan.

The definition of holy is “to be consecrated, set apart, dedicated or devoted to the service of God”. The world is not too concerned about holiness. Many people do not even understand that concept. How can I grow in holiness as I live with health problems? Do I believe that God is using these physical challenges to increase my holiness? Scripture says I am being made holy now – it is an ongoing process in this life. Whatever God is allowing in my life must be working toward that end.

There are opportunities to increase my dedication and devotion to God even while facing health challenges. Christian music, movies, and books are all wonderful ways to promote spiritual growth and draw me closer to God. Limited abilities have the potential of changing my perspective on what is truly important in this life. Participation in any activities, regardless of how small or sporadic, provide opportunities for developing a more grateful and thankful heart. Enduring and growing in my commitment to the Lord while suffering may be examples of perseverance and strength to others, possibly spurring them on to greater dedication and faith.

Striving for holiness is an actual act of worship in which we can participate daily, even with our limitations (Romans 12:1). God uses different means in all believers’ lives to change them into His likeness. Our illnesses and pains may well be the tools He is using to bring about the holiness that He desires in us. Let us allow them to finish their work, so we may be mature and complete, lacking nothing (James 1:4).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me a heart that desires holiness. Help me to accept whatever methods You choose to conform me to Your image. Amen.

Going in the Right Direction

2010-01-23T17:48:00.000-08:00

“May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance”
(II Thessalonians 3:5).

One of the most difficult aspects of chronic pain and illness is that it is unending. For every problem that is resolved, a new one seems to take its place. Each time I experience this, I am tempted to go in my usual directions of frustration, anger, and discouragement. This verse challenges me to do otherwise.

If I am directed into God’s love, I accept the truth that God loves me beyond my comprehension. He proved this love by sacrificing His only Son for me, and by giving me the indwelling comfort of His Holy Spirit. Enabling me to go through each new trial is one way God shows His love and faithfulness to me. He has not failed me yet, and I can release my doubts and discouragements, having total trust in His decisions for my life, including my physical struggles.

What of directing my heart into Christ’s perseverance? Jesus left His heavenly home, enduring the pain and discomforts of this earthly life. He did not give up in frustration or anger when the very ones He came to save rejected or misunderstood Him. Even knowing what lay ahead at Calvary, He continued on to His death – “Who for the joy set before Him, endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2). That is the kind of perseverance God is working in me – “after you have suffered a little while (He) will himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast” (I Peter 5:10). Every trial is another opportunity to draw me closer to Jesus, and His power will enable me to bear it.

In my own strength, I cannot possibly understand the depth of God’s love, nor can I remain as steadfast as Christ. But if my heart’s desire is to reach these goals, God’s power is strong enough to accomplish it. Then when the intense times of discouragement, pain, or hopelessness come, I will go in the right direction of meditating on these truths. There I will find my victory.

Prayer: My Savior and my God, use my trials to move me in the direction of drawing closer to You, rather than farther from You. Amen.

God's Unshakable Love, Peace, and Compassion

2010-01-19T05:29:00.001-08:00

" 'Though the mountains be shaken and the hills removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace removed,' says the Lord, who has compassion on you" (Isaiah 54:10).

In January of 2010, Haiti suffered a severe earthquake. Two of our church members were there, and thanks be to God, were kept safe. As I learned more about the total devastation and repercussions of this tragedy, I thought of this verse and its significance to those of us with chronic health problems.

Although I have not experienced a geological earthquake, there have been times when my life has been greatly shaken due to health problems. A new pain or questionable test result is a source of great concern. Loss of yet another ability is devastating. Sometimes it appears as though our world is literally falling down around us, and we may be tempted to give up all hope.

God’s Word says that even when we experience these “earthquakes” in our lives, He is still there for us. Nothing we are experiencing in our earthly bodies can remove His peace or love. God takes His covenants very seriously – seriously enough to have shed Jesus’ blood as a sign for us. We not only have His peace but His compassion as well. With each pain we experience – each tear we cry – God is pouring out His comfort and compassion in some way, though we may be unaware of it at the time. God’s compassion for us is greater than what we offer even to our own children (Psalm 103:13).

When we face these upheavals in our lives, we can know that regardless of how earth-shattering they may seem, God’s love, peace, and compassion will be there surrounding us. “Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall in to the heart of the sea” (Psalm 46:2). We have His Word on it – literally.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, how thankful we are that Your mercy, compassion, peace, and love never fail. Give us the faith to believe the truth of Your Word at all times. Before we call, You answer; while we are still speaking, You will hear (Isaiah 65:24). Amen.

Progressing Toward Praise

2010-01-17T10:43:00.001-08:00

“You have filled my heart with greater joy than when their grain and new wine abound”
(Psalm 4:7).

I noticed an interesting progression in this Psalm. David began with a cry of distress, asking God to answer him (verse 1). He acknowledged that God heard and answered his cries (verse 3), and then meditated in his heart, offering the sacrifices of praise to and trust in God (verses 4-5). He ended the Psalm being filled with joy. I also noted that in other Psalms of distress, whether joy was a byproduct or not, the authors reminded themselves of God’s faithfulness and ended with victorious words of assurance.

I began thinking of the way I handle my times of distress. Yes, I cry out to God, begging for relief, but do I continue as David did? Do I move on, meditating on God’s faithfulness to me in the past and committing myself to trusting Him for this particular moment? Do I give Him a sacrifice of praise in the midst of my turmoil? I must admit the answer is not always.

Not only did David receive great joy, but he also received peace which allowed him to sleep (verse 8). How many times have I lain awake at night worrying about the health or circumstances of myself or others? Of course there are nights of pain when praising God may not necessarily bring sleep, but there are many other times when fears and worries are my source of sleeplessness.

When I have followed David’s example, I have not always experienced joy afterwards. Yet the Holy Spirit has never failed to bring peace and sometimes the joy has come later. Whether I am facing a new crisis or whether I am dealing with the same recurring issues, I would do well to learn from David. It will require some self discipline, for it is easier to give in to the ways of my old nature than to grow into my new one. But I have the power of the resurrected Christ in me, and the end result will be well worth the effort.

Prayer: O Lord, as I end my pleas with praise, fill me with Your joy, victory, and peace. Amen.

Ambassadors for Christ

2010-01-17T10:05:00.001-08:00

"We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors,as though God were making his appeal
through us"(II Corinthians 5:20).

Our pastor once preached on this passage. I usually associate this verse with foreign missions, but as I listened, I was impressed with a new thought.

The word “ambassador” means having a mission or assignment to carry out. This verse does not say that Christ’s ambassadors are only the healthy, the strong, the mobile, or the mentally alert. It says that we – all believers – are on this mission for God.

Many days I may feel I don’t have any “assignment”– I may not be able to physically “do” anything from my perspective. I then thought about ambassadors to other countries. I’m sure there are times when every day is not packed with activity, yet they still remain as a constant presence, ready and prepared to represent their country.

I can do the same. There may be long periods where I feel there is no “mission” I am capable of carrying out for God, yet His Word says otherwise. We are God’s vessels on this earth. He has chosen us as well as the healthy and strong to represent Him. If nothing else, our continued perseverance and faith are an assignment which may have significant effects in someone else’s life.

An ambassador’s home is not where he is serving. He is living there temporarily until his mission is accomplished. I am actually doing that now on earth. Some days I am ready to finish my assignment and be sent home. But the Lord knows what only I can do for Him, and until that is finished, He will keep me here. One glorious day I will be able to say, “Mission accomplished”. May I also hear the Lord say, “Well done thou good and faithful servant”.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you that You choose not only the whole and healthy but the weak and infirm as Your vessels, for when we are weak, then You are strong. May we look on every day as an opportunity to represent You and to do it well. Amen.

Keeping Our Vision

2010-01-07T06:03:00.001-08:00

“Where there is no vision, the people perish, but he that keepeth the law, happy is he” Proverbs 29:18 KJV).

I have heard this verse quoted many times and applied to many circumstances. I recently realized how applicable this verse is to those of us with health conditions.

Living with limitations, it is easy to lose vision for our lives. Having to give up a job, career, ministry, or daily household tasks, we can feel useless and unnecessary. It becomes easy to fall into depression and isolation, and we can indeed begin to “perish”. I found that happening to myself at one point. The more depressed and isolated I became, the more difficulty I had bringing myself back in to contact with others. I was denying the truth of God’s Word which says that He has a plan and purpose for my life, regardless of my physical condition.

The Lord has a vision and purpose for each of us at this point in time. Before my health decline, my only writing consisted of college term papers written years ago. Yet God had a vision for my life which I would not have thought possible – writing devotionals. The same is true for each of us. We may not all be called to write, but we can intercede for, encourage, and support others to the glory of God in various ways.

Although health problems may seem to limit our earthly usefulness, they do not limit our usefulness in God’s kingdom. God’s ways and thoughts are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:8), and He will bring about all that He has planned (Isaiah 46:11). As we seek the Lord’s face, His light will guide and direct us in to the purposes He has for us, even in our infirmities. Every day, may we ask the Lord to see our lives with a thriving heavenly vision rather than a perishing earthly one.

Prayer: Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart; nought be all else to me, save that Thou art -Thou my best thought, by day or by night, waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light (Irish hymn). Amen.

For the Praise of His Glory

2010-01-07T06:01:00.000-08:00

“In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we . . . might be for the praise of his glory”
(Ephesians 1:11,12).

I once read the book Images of the Blue Ridge Parkway by George Humphries. Taking more than twenty years to accumulate perfect photographs for the book, the author succeeded in creating a glorious work of art and beauty.

I’m sure the author traveled at all hours, in all kinds of weather, and in all seasons of the year to acquire such perfect pictures. He probably had some days that were not successful and some photos that were disappointing. Perhaps when he first began taking pictures, he didn’t even know that the end result would be this beautiful masterpiece. It was an accumulation of hours, days, months, and years of perseverance and effort.

I began thinking of my own life. I continually struggle with my purpose here and ask God why – why must I deal with these limitations when so many others I know are leading such full, active lives? Just when I think I have come to total acceptance, I enter another round of questioning.

I realized that my life is like that book. I have had seasons full of activity and accomplishment – some nice photos. Now I am in a different place. Yet the entire sum of my life is producing a work of art for God’s glory. He is producing a masterpiece in me and in all believers, but it is one that takes many years and experiences to complete.

When I wake up in the morning and have that old familiar feeling of “why another day, Lord?”, I want to think of that lovely book and what it took to produce it. I’m traveling on my journey with God and need to ask myself how I can live another page of glory to Him today.

Prayer: Lord, give me the strength and desire to make Your glory reason enough to answer all my “whys”. Amen.

Looking Forward

2009-12-30T20:32:00.000-08:00

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!” (Isaiah 43:18).

Living with health problems, I sometimes struggle with remembering how life used to be. Cooking and shopping are more difficult. I am not able to accomplish as many household tasks as I did before. My travels must now revolve around my more limited mobility. It is understandable to mourn these losses, but if I really believe God is always good and always in control, then I should be looking forward.

I can appreciate my memories and be thankful for all I experienced “before”, but I must believe where I am now is for my ultimate good. Am I the same person I was before my health decline? Absolutely not. Are the changes for the good? Yes! I am a much more thankful person, becoming increasingly aware of even the smallest of blessings. I am growing in endurance and perseverance as I learn to enjoy things in the midst of pain and still say they are good. I am more compassionate toward others who suffer, and I am learning to rely continually on God's strength rather than my own.

God says not to dwell on the past. He is doing a new thing in my life – a much better thing in the light of eternity. I want to remember that thought as I go through these earthly struggles and disappointments. I have no concept of the eons in eternity where I will be free of pain. Until then, “forgetting what lies behind, and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13.14).

Prayer: O Lord, You are the God of my past, present, and future. Help me to balance thankfulness for my past with faith for my future. Amen.

Springs from the Rock

2009-12-30T20:25:00.000-08:00

“Tremble, O earth, at the presence of the Lord, . . . who turned the rock into a pool, the hard rock into springs of water” (Psalm 114:7,8).

This passage refers to the time in the Old Testament when the Israelites were wandering in the wilderness, waiting to enter the Promised Land. They were complaining about lack of water and God provided water through the rock which Moses struck with his staff.

It is interesting that although the Lord provided what they needed and asked for, He did not necessarily do it the way they might have chosen. Quite possibly they could have preferred being transported immediately into the new land, settled comfortably with all they needed then and there. That was not God’s plan.

We may question God’s provision in our own lives. We would like to be completely free from pain and illness immediately and continually. God may do that for us at some point in this life. For now however, He may give us freedom from pain temporarily or the endurance to survive the moment. The water He provided for the Israelites was enough to meet their need of thirst. He continued to provide as long as they had that need.

God’s provision for us is enough for today. It will always be enough. He will turn our rocks into pools if we allow Him to do it in the way He thinks best. As we accept the springs He gives us, our thirst will be satisfied.

Prayer: Father, You are my constant provision, meeting my needs as they come. Give me grace to trust You for the springs of living water I need today. Amen.

Purpose While Afflicted

2009-12-30T20:13:00.001-08:00

“For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all” (II Corinthians 4:17).

There are moments when I believe the truth of this verse, but many times it is difficult to believe in and wait for that eternal reward.

Living with chronic pain and illness I often become self-focused. Daily thoughts can revolve around my discomfort level, medication choices, or limitations on my activities. My troubles do not seem light and momentary. In my relationship with God and what He is doing in my life, I see only my “square of the chessboard” - how my circumstances are affecting me now. I want God to be “all about me”. He is, but He is all about others as well.

If we allow God to do so, He may begin showing us how our pain and suffering can impact others for tremendous good. In the midst of our own struggles, whether we send an encouraging note, pray for someone we know who is struggling, or brighten someone’s day via phone or e-mail, we are all part of God’s bigger picture to touch the lives of others. Perhaps our pain is developing a stronger prayer life in someone we know who is praying for us or allowing them to be a giver rather than a receiver. Handling even one aspect of our suffering well may be a testimony and example to those around us, affecting their lives in a way no healthy life ever could.

When I become too focused on my pain and trials, I want to pray for a heart of thankfulness for all that they may be accomplishing in my life and in the lives of others - now and in eternity. God give me the grace to do it.

Prayer: Lord, give me the strength to stand firm in the faith, knowing that after I have suffered a little while, You will restore me, making me strong, firm, and steadfast (I Peter 5:9,10). May I be willing to endure my trials for Your eternal purposes. Amen.

The Battle Belongs to the Lord

2009-12-30T20:11:00.000-08:00

“O Sovereign Lord, my strong deliverer, who shields my head in the day of battle” (Psalm 140:7).

The word “battle” evokes different images for different people. For my husband, who is interested in military history, it would bring to mind strategic moments in the Civil War or World War II - Gettysburg or the Battle of the Bulge. For myself, who enjoys medieval history, I might envision knights and castles, battering rams and catapults. In the Christian realm, we are reminded of our battles against the world, the flesh, and the devil.

For those of us with pain and illness, the word "battle" may take on an entirely new meaning. Every day may become a battle of some sort – battling depression, fear, anxiety, discouragement, weakness, pain, or disappointment. Just as with actual physical battles, our bodies feel the fight. War is exhausting and leaves its scars.

Scripture compares our Christian walk to a battle and reminds us that the battle is not ours but God’s (II Chronicles 20:15). In our own strength we are not capable of handling the daily barrage of attacks on our bodies and the mental anguish that comes with them. But the Lord is more than able. Note that in the above verse the head is what is shielded. How necessary it is for the Lord to guard our thoughts daily, keeping them focused on Him and His strength rather than the trials and struggles at hand.

Our Lord is a strong deliverer and will support us and carry us through every battle of each day. We may feel as though we have been slain and are lying in the dust, unable to get up yet again to fight. But God’s Word says He gives us His shield of victory and His right hand sustains us. He will be with us through every battle today and the next day and the next, until the ultimate battle is fought, won, and we are free. For today, “be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power” (Ephesians 6:10).

Prayer: God of power and might, You are my Jehovah-Nissi – my banner held high, going before me in my daily battles. I praise You for the victories You give and for being my strength when I am weak. Amen.

My Burden Bearer

2009-12-16T09:12:00.000-08:00

"Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. Our God is a God who saves" (Psalm 68:19).

My daughters and I used to play the board game “Pilgrims Progress” based on the classic book of that title. We each had little plastic pilgrim playing pieces complete with knapsack burdens fastened to our backs. When we reached the cross on the playing board, we unfastened our burdens and left them there. We then continued on to the Celestial City, using our armor and the Word to fight the attacks of the enemy along the way.

I carry many burdens on my own back, my physical ones being the heaviest. I can also become overwhelmed by current events and catastrophes, or by the struggles of others I know and care for. My shoulders are not meant to bear those weights. Jesus bore them on the cross and He is now in control of the outcomes. What I may be viewing as burdens to be removed as quickly as possible are in reality opportunities for God to show His love, power, and might, working out His perfect will and building faith and trust in the process.

How differently I would handle the cares of this world if I maintained the Biblical view of trials – that they are good and positive tools, protecting me from my controlling nature and keeping me totally reliant upon and trusting in God. This fallen world will never be free from burdens. I need to lay mine down at the foot of the cross daily – sometimes hourly or more. The Lord Himself then picks them up and takes care of them, every day. Why do I keep picking those knapsacks back up and hauling them around when I can walk in freedom? O Lord, set me free from my prison that I might praise Your name (Psalm 142:7).

Prayer: Gracious and loving God, may I have the self-discipline to give You my burdens daily and leave them there. Save me from my cares, and let me say with the psalmist, “I run in the path of Your commands, for you have set my heart free” (Psalm 119:32). Amen.

Beginning to Sink

2009-11-18T03:55:00.000-08:00

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith" (Hebrews 12:2).

While growing up, my dad was an interim preacher for many churches. We traveled with him and sometimes would hear the same sermon for weeks. One of his favorites was entitled “Beginning to Sink”, based on the story of Peter walking on the water to Christ. Dad focused on one’s eternal future and dying. Now however, I relate the story to living.

Initially, Peter had enough faith to step out of the boat and into the crashing waves, blowing wind, and darkness. Rather than viewing his situation from an earthly perspective, he looked with eyes of trust in and love for the One towards whom he walked. But when his eyes were drawn away from Christ and toward his surroundings, he lost his faith. The moment that happened, his fears became reality.

I am much like Peter. When I take my eyes off Christ for even a moment, I begin to sink. I look at others and am envious. I remember my past and grieve. I think of the present and despair. I look toward the future and am afraid. I lose my faith. Faith is total trust in God, believing that He is good, and that His plans for me are the best even now in my life of trials and pain.

Christ has said He will never leave me or forsake me. He is upholding me with His victorious right hand. He is greater than the one who is in the world. He is a God who works wonders. He is accomplishing His purpose for me. When I keep my eyes focused on Christ and His promises only, I too experience His miracles: endurance to press on during pain and discouragement, strength to touch others despite my weakness, and enjoyment and refreshment in the midst of struggles. He surely is worthy of my complete faith and trust, and will keep me from sinking.

Prayer: Lord, give me a steadfast faith that will not waver, fixing my eyes on You alone. Amen.

Setting Our Hearts on Pilgrimage

2009-11-10T05:37:00.000-08:00

"Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. As they pass through the Valley of Baca (Weeping), they make it a place of springs. . . They go from strength to strength, til each appears before God in Zion" (Psalm 84:5-7).

The above passage is one of my favorites, and I recently noticed the word “pilgrimage” for the first time. A pilgrimage is a long journey. But what does it mean to set our hearts on it? We must realize it is indeed a journey. This walk of a pain-filled life is not brief and does not have easy resolutions. It will, however, have an ending, just as any earthly journey does. We must keep our eyes set on our heavenly destination, maintaining an attitude of faith, perseverance, and determination, regardless of what we encounter along the way. If our hearts are truly set on this journey with God, nothing will make us give up. We will stay on this road and keep going, trusting in the One who planned our trip.

As we persevere God turns our tears into pools of refreshment, not only for ourselves but for others as well. He enables us to go from strength to strength – not trial to trial or suffering to suffering. With any new obstacle we encounter – any pain, disability, or crisis – the Lord provides new strength to get us through and to continue on our journey.

Some days I enjoy my pilgrimage and other days I do not. But regardless of how I feel or what I encounter, He will be there with me until I see His face.

Prayer: Lord, may I set my heart on this journey with You, ready to accept whatever pain and trials You allow. I know that You are here and will continue to give the refreshment, comfort, and strength that I need to keep on traveling. Amen.

Standing on the Heights

2009-11-10T05:02:00.000-08:00

“It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me to stand on the heights”
(Psalm 18:32,33).

Although not athletic as a child, in young adulthood I discovered some physical activities I enjoyed and had a few short years to pursue them – bicycling, jogging, aerobics, and walking. Those activities left me feeling exhilarated, motivated and energized. I took the ability to do those things for granted, fitting them into my schedule as time allowed. As my health issues slowly started increasing, my physical activities dwindled. Little of those activities remain today. Although the losses were somewhat gradual, it was still extremely difficult to give up hope of them being restored.

On a visit to the mountains with my husband, we took a few short hikes. I enjoyed that day immensely, but suffered repercussions of the walks for days afterwards and was tempted to begin my downhill spiral of self-pity. I realized, however, that although I live with physical limitations, I have opportunities to “exercise” my body and mind every day. I can endure physical as well as mental and emotional pain and do it well. God gives me strength to survive every day. Each morning I can put on the spiritual armor and prepare to fight my battles, regardless of how tired or weak I feel. Psalm 18:29 says that with God’s help I can advance against a troop and scale a wall. My “troop” may be countless negative thoughts. My “wall” may be the task of getting up, dressed, and ready to face the day. God can and will enable me to exercise faith and self-discipline in any circumstances.

My physical limitations are part of this earthly life, but one day in eternity I will be able to literally run with hind’s feet to the top of the mountain. How wonderful that will feel! For today, I can stand on the heights in my own way, praise God.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, remind me that whatever mountains I am facing in my life, they are not too high to climb with You. Strengthen my feeble arms and weak knees, and lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Amen.

Flowers from Flaws

2009-11-10T04:39:00.000-08:00

"The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever – do not abandon the work of your hands" (Psalm 138:8).

Every fall there are clusters of beautiful golden wildflowers blooming along many of our roadsides. They remind me of a story I once heard about a cracked pot. A woman owned several clay pots which she used to carry water from the well to her home each day. One pot was cracked and leaked, losing half of its water on the walk home.

The pot became very discouraged and finally told the woman how useless and discouraged it felt because of its flaws. The woman said that the next day she wanted the pot to notice the beautiful flowers blooming along the roadside. The pot did, and thought they were lovely, but still felt like a failure. The woman then told the pot that she knew it had cracks and flaws, yet she chose to keep it. She planted the flowers along the way, knowing that each day the cracked pot would water them on the walk home. The lovely flowers were there because of the pot's flaws.

I see similarities here in my own life. I look at other people and am sharply aware of the cracks and flaws in my body. The woman in the story did not choose to discard the pot, or even seal the cracks with mud or clay. Its very flaws were accomplishing her purpose. So it is with those of us who feel “flawed”. God is using us just as we are for His purposes. Some days He may allow us to see buds of our influence, but many days we may have no idea of the flowers we are watering along the roads we travel. Yet God knows, and one day all will be made plain. Until then, we are fulfilling His purpose here on earth, and He will never abandon us.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I am the work of Your hands - beautiful in Your sight, created for a purpose, and never left alone. Help me to accept my flaws and imperfections, that through them You may bring blessing to others and glory to Yourself. Amen.

Living through Changes

2009-11-10T04:37:00.000-08:00

“We who are alive are constantly being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, that his life might be revealed in our mortal bodies” (II Corinthians 4:11).

I have realized that change is challenging for me. Perhaps it comes from the fact that I moved around frequently as a child and felt insecure in having to attend new schools and build new relationships. For whatever reason, I dislike change.

Each of us has changes in our lives that have been difficult to overcome. Some of my most challenging physical changes have been chronic health and pain issues and their resulting losses. An empty nest proved to be extremely difficult emotionally. I read something a few years ago that made an impression upon me. I do not recall who wrote it, but it said, “Life involves change. Change involves loss. Loss involves death. Every time we are delivered over to a death of any kind, we are challenged to allow the loss to bring gain for Jesus’ sake. We do this by allowing his life to be revealed in our mortal bodies.”

Changes in our health do bring loss and what could even be called dying to parts of ourselves - loss of abilities, activities, relationships, experiences, hopes, and plans. There is pain and grief in that loss. Yet the above verse speaks of the good that can come out of those changes. Somehow every “death” that we experience on any given day can bring glory to God. Perhaps it is by praising Him and trusting Him to get us through, rather than by listening to the voice of the enemy and giving in to fear and discouragement. Perhaps it is by sharing our experiences with someone else as a word of encouragement or empathy. Whatever the circumstances, in life or death, our ultimate reason for existence is to glorify God. If it takes change in our lives to do that, let it be so.

Prayer: O God, how thankful I am that in the ebb and flow of my life’s days, You remain the same. Remind me that regardless of changes taking place around me and within me, You give me strength to walk in newness of life with You. Amen.

The Solid Rock

2009-11-09T06:59:00.000-08:00

"Look to the rock from which you were cut and to the quarry from which you were hewn"
(Isaiah 51:1)

There are times in my life when I forget the spiritual roots of my new nature in Christ. When I am in the midst of a setback in pain, anxiety, or depression, how quickly I revert to my old nature of doubt and unbelief. I need to remind myself not only of Who lives within me, but of my Christian “family tree”. Hebrews 11 is the great Hero Hall of Fame in Scripture, bearing testimony to the believers who lived by faith, regardless of their physical circumstances and sufferings. Our Lord Himself was the perfect example of faith and trust in the Father’s plan, never fearing or wavering during times of trial and temptation.

We are “cut” from the solid rock of Christ. I see the stones in His “quarry” as representing the countless believers who have lived and will yet live through time. These stones vary in shape, size, and usage. Some of them may be crushed into finer pieces than others. Some may be more prominent than others. Yet they all are chiseled from the same block of stone – Christ, the Chief Cornerstone.

When I am tempted to fear and give up hope, I need to remember that I have the strength and solidarity of Christ, and that I am surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses which includes my fellow believers in heaven as well as here on earth. I’m not only standing on the solid rock, I’m part of it.

Prayer: Lord, when all around me gives way, help me to stand on You – my solid rock. Let me not forget my spiritual heritage, and may it be a source of comfort and inspiration to me today. Amen.

The Mountains of God

2009-11-09T06:58:00.000-08:00

“I will lift my eyes to the hills – where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth” (Psalm 121:1,2).

What is there about mountains that attract us? We enjoy climbing them, vacationing to them, and photographing them. Gazing up at an individual mountain peak or a vast mountain range is awesome to behold - beautiful and majestic in any season of the year. Whether they are bare, snow-covered, green, or golden, mountains evoke feelings of strength, protection, and peacefulness – wonderful visual images of God’s might and power.

Yet mountains can leave us feeling isolated and lonely as well. At times I associate mountains with difficult obstacles in my life, such as my daily pain and ongoing health struggles. In those moments when mountains do not seem so pleasant, I need to run to the Lord and His Word.

Psalm 97:5 says the mountains melt like wax before the Lord. Think about the weight of even one small hill and the power it would take to move it. This is the power of our God. The God who created, melts, and moves mountains is the God who loves me and lives within me. He is reigning over the entire earth, including my individual life. Nothing that comes my way can keep His power and peace from reaching me.

I can choose to allow the mountains in my life to build faith and trust in God rather than allowing them to leave me feeling desolate and alone. God created mountains – even mine. We will either climb them together, or He will remove them. Whatever He may choose, my help comes from Him.

Prayer: Father, as the mountains surround Jerusalem, so You surround Your people now and forevermore (Psalm 125:2). Surround me with the mountains of Your love, peace, and strength today. Amen.

The Lord Is My Light

2009-11-09T06:56:00.000-08:00

"The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?" (Psalm 27:1).

My husband and I love lighthouses. While visiting our daughter in Maine one summer, we saw some of the northern lighthouses. They were beautiful and impressive to behold.

Lighthouses have been vital structures for years. By night their shining lights have kept many ships from crashing onto rocks and sand bars, lighting the way through the inky blackness. By day they have been a welcome sign of land after many long days and perhaps months at sea. Their lights are visible at all times regardless of the weather, and they stand firm against the fiercest storms.

As I looked at the lighthouses in Maine, I was reminded that they are wonderful representations of our God. On sunny days we may enjoy this journey of life, looking to Him and knowing the eternal home towards which we journey. On foggy days of fear and uncertainty, His light is there to offer hope and strength. On our darkest days of pain and weakness, His promises keep us from crashing onto the rocks of discouragement and despair. There is no storm in our lives that He cannot help us withstand, no waves that He cannot still, no darkness so black that His light cannot penetrate.

The seas of our daily lives vary as much as the changing ocean, depending upon our physical conditions and circumstances. The lighthouse of God’s presence remains firm and solid. “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God” (Isaiah 41:10).

Prayer: Lord, thank You for being my light and salvation. Help me to keep my eyes focused on that light today. Amen.

Sorrowful Yet Rejoicing

2009-11-09T06:55:00.000-08:00

"Sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything” (II Corinthians 6:10).

Although fall is my favorite season of the year, it is a bittersweet time for me as well. The golden days of autumn are lovely and I want them to linger. The mixed emotions that fall brings remind me of an incident that occurred some months ago.

We planned to visit one of our daughters to celebrate her birthday, and she lived five hours away. Unfortunately I was in the midst of a major flare-up with back pain. I knew that I could become anxious and fearful concerning the duration and intensity of my pain, and that starting my rounds of medications often resulted in a totally depressed and discouraged frame of mind. I also knew if I went down that path this time, the trip could be spoiled not only for myself but for my daughter and husband as well. I truly wanted my response to be different.

God had proved Himself faithful countless times before. Why would He disappoint me now? The Lord enabled me to have wonderful victory. I was in pain or discomfort the entire weekend, yet I can honestly say that I enjoyed the trip and did not allow my problems to dampen the visit. Would I have enjoyed it more without the pain? Of course! Yet I was given grace to enjoy it through the pain.

Very few things in this life will bring complete joy and happiness. There is usually some bittersweetness in every joyous occasion. If nothing else I know it will end. Yet God gives me the ability to find joy in the midst of sorrow, bringing me comfort for the moment at hand and giving me hope for the eternal future yet to come.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I praise You for the joy that will be mine in eternity. Now in this earthly life, give me the ability to rejoice even through sorrow, recognizing the good amidst the pain. Amen.

Songs of Joy

2009-11-09T06:50:00.000-08:00

"Where morning dawns and evening fades, you call forth songs of joy" (Psalm 65:8).

I have always loved this verse because it reminds me of the early morning hours when the world is just waking up. It’s such a tranquil time before the rush of life begins. Enjoying the morning hours has become difficult over the last several years due to health issues, and the past few mornings have been especially hard for me. I have been dealing with another round of back pain, this time more severe than it has been in quite awhile. As I write this I am literally on my knees, unable to sit. My usual response to this kind of setback has been a cycle of pain, panic, and depression. But this time, I wanted to call forth songs of joy rather than despair.

Each morning, creation sings of the Creator through sunrises and birdsongs. I’ve noticed it even more lately with the approach of spring. I am reminded of the passages in Scripture describing the trees as clapping their hands and the mountains and hills bursting into song. I can almost imagine this as I watch the newly budding tree branches rustling in the morning breeze. The Lord’s presence can speak even through the rains of a cloudy morning. God is here and the earth proclaims this in any weather.

I want to do that too, despite my physical condition. Psalms 97:11 says light dawns for the righteous and joy for the upright in heart. I want that light and joy to dawn this morning, in the midst of this pain and incapacity. I don’t usually handle these setbacks righteously or uprightly, but the fact that He is giving me even the desire to praise Him through this is testimony to the fact that He is here - now - in this new morning. Our God is a mighty God who works wonders, and this time, perhaps He is working one in me.

Prayer: Thank you God that this is Your world and all nature sings to You. Let me hear it and see it today despite my circumstances, calling forth songs of joy in me. Amen.

Soaring with God

2009-11-09T06:48:00.000-08:00

"Those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint"(Isaiah 40:31).

In the past few years, I have developed an interest in birds. God used birds to help me through my own “empty nest”, and I have found that bird watching is something I can do despite my physical limitations. One of the things I appreciate most about birds is their ability to soar and glide so effortlessly. At times they seem to fly simply for the pleasure of it, and they are beautiful and entertaining to watch.

With my new interest in birds, this verse has become even more meaningful to me now than in the past. I have struggled with depression for many years, and on my most difficult days, the heaviness can be overwhelming. All I can do is to trust in God, knowing that these feelings will pass and are not based on the truths of God’s Word.

In those moments I need to remind myself that God can lift me up out of this heaviness and into the heights, soaring just like my birds. That may be difficult to believe when the depression or pain is so intense, yet every word of God proves true (Proverbs 30:5 NLT). I must believe that He is faithful and can bring me out of the depths of despair and into the heights of renewed energy and hope.

My body may not be swift, agile, and graceful like the birds, but my spirit can be lifted as God renews my strength. When I see birds flying in the sky, I want to take heart and remember that I too can soar, for I have a God who performs miracles and displays His power among the peoples (Psalm 77:14).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You that Your Spirit lives within me. You raise me to new heights of endurance and perseverance,bringing joy and peace in the process. Carry me on Your wings today. Amen.

Lacking Nothing, Possessing Everything

2009-11-09T06:42:00.000-08:00

“And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work” (II Corinthians 9:8).

This is a tremendously positive and encouraging Scripture. Notice the choice of words. All– used four times – is defined as nothing being lacking, the whole extent. To abound is to be plentiful and filled to overflowing. Every includes all that there could be – the fullest possible amount. Examine how the passage makes use of these words.

“God is able to make all grace abound.” Countless times a day we need God’s grace to show patience, humility, kindness, and other qualities. We are incapable of doing that in our own strength, but He gives total grace.

“So that in all things.” God is present in all conditions and circumstances. No situation takes Him by surprise or is beyond His control.

“At all times.” Regardless of our pain level, irritability, or weakness, He is near. Whether at home or at work, with others or alone, He is there.

“Having all you need.” There will be constant provision of the strength, courage, and endurance needed to face life. The Holy Spirit and His power dwell within us as believers. Physical needs will be met as well. Nothing will be lacking.

“You will abound in every good work.” God is quite capable of continuing to use us for His kingdom and others’ good despite our restrictions.

How may we apply these words to our illness and pain? They remind us that no day will be so difficult that we can not survive it. There will never be a time when He is not there. They tell us that His sufficiency is all-encompassing and complete. They encourage us with the fact that we will still be able to serve Him in some way, regardless of our limitations. Rejoice today! El Shaddai – the All-Sufficient One – is here.

Prayer: Lord, thank you for being my Jehovah Jireh – my Provider. May I walk in the power of that knowledge this day. Amen.

Jars of Clay

2009-11-09T06:34:00.000-08:00

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us” (II Corinthians 4:7).

I am fascinated by the making of pottery – the skill involved in molding, shaping, and baking it to produce either a work of art or a practical container. In Biblical times, clay jars were a necessity of life in which to carry and store things. They were vital yet fragile as well, for they were easily broken.

The Master Potter has molded each of us. He began before we were even aware of life. He knew as He was turning and forming the clay what our lives would hold, both the joyous and the difficult. Our illnesses and pain are no surprise to Him. Sometimes my jar cracks and chips. At times I’ve felt that I have been dropped from a great height, shattered into many pieces. But God lovingly picks up the pieces, adds His life-giving water, and patches me up, each time strengthening the weak spots with His promises and love.

Our imperfect jars of clay are still capable of holding things - the fragrant incense of prayer and praise for the One who sustains us and the flowering blooms of love and support for those around us. Last but not least, we are a visual work of art created by the Lord of the universe to enjoy. Let us ever be reminded of what we are and Whose we are, and of His all-surpassing power and strength that never fail.

Prayer: Lord you are my Creator and Designer. Thank you for molding me in to a vessel of Your choosing. Fill the container of my life with plantings of prayer, praise, and encouragement. Amen.

God's Workmanship

2009-11-09T06:01:00.000-08:00

“For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10).

As an adult, I have always associated who I am with what I achieve. At the end of a day, if I could list various things I had accomplished, it was a good day. Days during which I accomplished nothing or very little seemed like wasted days. My self-worth was based on activities and accomplishments.

As my physical and sometimes mental and emotional limitations have increased, my “accomplishments” have decreased. At one point I had to give up everything for a time – my church ministries, my job, my social time with friends, and my hobbies. My three daughters also left home, thus I was facing empty nest as well. I felt I had lost my identity and my reason for living. Life seemed meaningless, useless, and purposeless.

This verse opposes those thoughts. God created each of us knowing what our lives would hold. He knew the illnesses, pain, and circumstances we would face. The word “workmanship” speaks to me of great craftsmanship, care, planning and forethought, not something shoddy and imperfect. The second half of the above verse is also of great encouragement. Psalm 139:16 says that God planned our days before we were even born. Despite how limited we are in our abilities, there are things that only we can accomplish for God. No matter how small our sphere of influence, there is someone we can touch each day, whether through a prayer, an e-mail, or an actual encounter. We are all very special and necessary to God and His kingdom work, regardless of how insignificant or useless we feel on a given day. That thought is reason enough to start each day, remembering that “he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion, until the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, let me not forget how precious I am in Your sight, and that You have created me for special work that only I can do for Your kingdom. Thank you for making me just as I am. Amen.

God's Name - A Strong Tower

2009-11-09T05:59:00.000-08:00

“Give thanks to the Lord, call on his name” (Psalm 105:1).

Scripture is filled with passages encouraging us to call upon the name of the Lord. Psalm 18:3 says, “I call to the Lord who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies.” I have many enemies. These enemies are not physical human beings, but rather thoughts and feelings that rob me of my faith and joy in God. The enemies of fear, worry, anger, depression, and many others draw me away from believing that God is truly good and in control of my life. At times, these feelings are natural human responses, but Satan knows how to use them in such a way that they become enemies to my spiritual and physical well-being.

God has many names in Scripture and I have found it helpful to speak them. I may praise Him for being my Elohim (Creator) when I am able to enjoy the beauty of this world. I may cry out for Him to be my Jehovah-sabaoth ( Lord of Hosts) when I need His protection against the attacks of Satan’s lies. When I feel abandoned and hopeless, He is my El Roi (the God Who Sees). I continually ask Him to be Jehovah-rapha (Healer), and above all He is my Savior. God’s name is powerful. It is a strong tower – a place of safety and refuge (Proverbs 18:10). On the days when I am weary with pain and discouragement, I run to that strong tower where I find the grace and strength I so desperately need.

Just as I know God’s name, He knows mine: “He calls his own sheep by name” (John 10:3). How wonderful that we each can have such an intimate relationship with our Lord! He knows our names and our needs even before we ask. And how comforting to know that regardless of how often we call His name, He always hears our cry.

Prayer: Almighty Lord, Your Word says that because You love me, You will rescue me and protect me because I know Your name. When I call, You will answer (Psalm 91:14,15). Thank you for those wonderful and comforting promises. Help me to believe those promises today. Amen.

Fear Not

2009-11-09T05:56:00.000-08:00

“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind”
(II Timothy 1:7 KJV).

I have struggled with fear for most of my life. As a child, I feared pain and the unknown. As an adult, I have been fearful about finances, my children’s lives, and the health of loved ones. Now I fear my future – how severe and debilitating my health problems will become and how I will keep up with the daily tasks of life. I have had to face this weakness for what it is - a real sin in my life and a way the enemy has of attacking me and my trust and faith in God.

God’s Word says He has given me power, love, and a sound mind. I have the same power that raised Christ from the dead – resurrection power - flowing through me at every moment, capable of helping me face any circumstances.

The love I possess encompasses God’s love for me as well as my love for Him. Scripture says if God loved me so much that He sent his Son, He will surely give me everything else I need (Romans 8:32). His Word also says that if I love God, I will obey His commandments (I John 5:3), which include totally trusting Him and His decisions regarding my life.

The last part of this verse is most significant to me. I particularly like this translation of “a sound mind”. When I am in the throes of panic, fear, and worry, my mind is not sound. I am believing every lie Satan throws at me. I am thinking about vain imaginings – things that may or may not happen. I am taking on the problems of others and making them my own when they may not be what God has intended for my life.

God has specific plans for each of us. He knows exactly what is best and will bring those things to pass in His own way and time. To doubt that is to deny His sovereignty and His love. When fears assail us, we can claim these mighty gifts of love, power, and a sound mind as our own. We are new creatures in Christ, and we can have a new way of thinking as well.

Prayer: Lord, help me to remember You have given me the ability to demolish the stronghold of fear in my life. Give me that victory today and every day, as I take every thought captive to make it obedient to You (II Corinthians 10:5). Amen.

At All Times I Will Bless Him

2009-11-09T05:49:00.000-08:00

“I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips. My soul will boast in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together”
(Psalm 34:1-3).

Many places in Scripture urge us to praise the Lord, and I have learned what power and comfort there is in doing this. We all know Job’s story and have felt at times like him. Whether our problems are health-related or circumstance-related, everyone has had to deal with struggles and trials. We know, at least in our minds, that we should give thanks in all circumstances. Yet it is not an easy thing to do.

When my struggle with pain and depression had gone on for a seemingly endless amount of time, I remembered the above passage of Scripture and a song we sang at church based on that passage. With tears streaming down my face, in desperation I cried, “Yes Lord, I will praise you even in this. At ALL times I will bless you; your praise will be on my lips.” About that same time, a song came out by Matt Redman called “Blessed Be Your Name” with the identical theme – praise God when things are good but also praise Him when they are not. I began trying to do that more and more, and I was amazed at how God took my tears of praise and brought peace and comfort. Was I healed? Not physically, at least at this point in time. Did I receive inner healing and strength for the moment? A resounding yes! My response of praise is slowly becoming easier, and God continues to uplift me without fail.

When the heaviness, the depression, the overwhelming feelings of incapacity and pain come upon me, I know that the exhortation to praise is not only for His glory but also for my benefit. Despite how difficult it may be to mentally and emotionally drag myself to my feet, He gives me the strength to do so. And God comes. “Those who look to him are radiant” (Psalm 34:5). Exalt His name with me.

Prayer: Father, teach me to praise You at all times, regardless of my circumstances. Give me strength to do so, knowing that as I humble myself before You, You will lift me up in due time. Amen.

A Firm Foundation

2009-11-09T05:47:00.000-08:00

“He will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure” (Isaiah 33:6).

I have spent most of my years living in the south. I have seen numerous homes that are several hundred years old. In fact, in the early years of my marriage, we lived in a farmhouse that pre-dated the Civil War. Obviously these buildings must have solid foundations to have withstood the ravages of time.

We need firm foundations in our lives as well. If our foundations – where we place our trust and hope – are cracking or crumbling, our lives will eventually come tumbling down around us. This is even more true for those of us dealing with chronic health issues on a daily basis. How we need the strength and solidarity of the Lord to help us through our challenges!

As this verse states, the Lord is our source of salvation, wisdom, and knowledge. As sinners, we are in great need of a Savior. Many times a day we may react in anger, fear, or faithlessness concerning our health struggles. We need His wisdom to give us guidance concerning medications, treatments, and activity levels. We need the knowledge of Him that Scripture gives, so that we may speak the truth to ourselves in times of trial. The Biblical truths that God is good, loving, all-knowing, all-powerful, compassionate, and in total control of our lives will help us through our difficult days. Fearing the Lord is to trust Him, to be in reverent awe of Him, to give Him glory through all circumstances, and to yield our lives to Him, even when circumstances are not of our choosing.

I don’t want my foundation to be upon the sands of this life. I want my foundation resting on the mountainous rock of the Lord and His Word. Then when the rains come, I will still be standing (Matthew 7:25-27).

Prayer: O Lord, how firm a foundation is laid for me in your excellent word. You strengthen me, help me, and cause me to stand, upheld by your omnipotent hand. May I lean on you this day. Amen. (Hymn – How Firm A Foundation)

A Perfect Life

2009-11-09T05:44:00.000-08:00

“See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ”
(Colossians 2:8).

I have always struggled with perfectionism. In order for something to be enjoyable, it had to be as close to perfect as possible. Before my health decline, if an event or activity was not “perfect”, it was a disappointment. I wanted perfect weather, perfect health, perfect activities, and perfect attitudes. Needless to say, not many things lived up to my expectations.

The world promotes the idea that to be truly happy, life must be perfect. If it is not, there are ways to reach that desired state. Television commercials and magazine advertisements are prime examples of this philosophy. We are constantly lured into believing that what we want is within our reach. We can attain it and even have a right to it.

As one with chronic health issues, this idea is one of the world’s “hollow and deceptive philosophies” that is a great temptation to me. If I believe that I can enjoy something only if conditions are just right (no pain or problems), then I will enjoy very few things. I will miss opportunities in which to persevere and grow. I will miss moments not only to increase my faith in God, but also to allow God to show His faithfulness to me.

The perfection I seek will not be found during this earthly life. We were originally created by God for a perfect existence with Him, and the desire for that is within us. Yet we have to accept the fact that it will not be realized until eternity. The world’s view of “the best” is a far different standard from God’s view and it can never satisfy us. Until then, why should I miss many moments of blessing that the Lord gives by saying they are not good enough? “As for God, his way is perfect” (Psalm 18:30). His way for me is perfect as well.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me endurance to wait for the glorious life ahead. While I wait, help me to see all the blessings You have given me in this imperfect world and to make the most of them. Amen.

Lovely Thoughts

2009-11-09T04:44:00.000-08:00

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things”
(Philippians 4:8).

Negative thinking affects my health. Upon waking in the morning, I am amazed at how many negative thoughts come to mind before I am even ready to meet the day! I may dwell on a difficult encounter with someone or on past hurts. I may be analyzing my pain and ability level for the day, remembering mornings when I bounded out of bed to walk, jog, or bike. This thinking pattern may stay with me throughout the day and can be a constant struggle.

Positive thoughts can also affect me. I can awaken praising God for the abilities I do have rather than those which I do not have. I can recall His constant faithfulness on other painful days, knowing His mercies are new every morning. I may think of an individual’s positive qualities rather than his faults. I can be thankful for opportunities to grow through difficult situations. These positive outlooks lift my spirits and cause me to dwell less on my pain.

As a believer I have many reasons to think positively. How easy it is for me to brush lightly over my eternal future and the gift of salvation when I am consumed with my current pain and struggles. God has given me many other blessings which I sometimes take for granted. I need to dwell on what I have rather than on what I lack.

My desire is to maintain a positive mental attitude throughout each day, regardless of my circumstances or pain. As I dwell on lovely thoughts, God’s loveliness will shine through me, and perhaps radiate to others. Let it be so today.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, may I take every thought captive, making it obedient to You. Help me to cast down anything that is not true to Your Word and to see Your loveliness in all things. Amen.